Comic/Writer/Actor/HyphenFan. Anoush from Cobra Kai, Amir from The Crew, also Amir from Bajillion, Phil from Kickin It, host of ‘Green Eggs & Dan’
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Me quarantined with my parents watching sex scenes. Take me now, COVID. #QuaratineLife
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Writing funnies for the Janoskians @YouTube
@janoskians @BrooksBeau @luke_brooks @JaiBrooks1 @James_Yammouni
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Quarantine update. I finally told my parents they’re internet celebrities with a video that has 8 million views. They’ve had no clue this whole time. #QuarantineLife
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Can't wait to Uber you to our premiere. #PublicDisturbance
@danielsahyounie @BrooksBeau @luke_brooks @JaiBrooks1
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A lot of people forget Will Smith is an Executive Producer of Cobra Kai. Now they’ll remember. #Oscars
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Happy birthday, @WilliamZabka! Sure, you kicked my ass, but it sounds way more soothing in Portuguese. #cobrakai #anoush #johnny
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Inside voice: "Oh, that's so interesting Mr. Tyson."
Outside voice: "PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!!"
#PublicDisturbance
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Thanks for coming out Janoskians! You guys are awesome.
@BrooksBeau @JaiBrooks1 @luke_brooks @danielsahyounie
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It took 20 years but I think they’re finally ok with the fact that I didn’t go to med school. #TheCrew -#Netflix #TimesSquare
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For everyone asking what my #QuarantineLife birthday was like...
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Happy #PubDay to the classiest man I know, @ralphmacchio. This book is just as delightful as the man himself. And he’s pretty friggin delightful! Order here: amzn.to/3s8vZS0
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If I showed you this picture 5 years ago, you’d be like “Damn, Madame Tussaud’s has jumped the shark.”
#TrumpKimSummit
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If anyone asks you "Have you seen Hamilton" they're basically asking "Are you a rich person?"
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The most amazing thing about this article is that I was getting drunk w/ Bari the night before it came out and she said nothing! Maybe a “Hey, the best thing I’ve ever written is dropping tomorrow” would’ve been more appropriate than the constant “Where’s my Negroni, fucker!?”
American liberalism is in danger. A new ideology is rising to replace it—and it has dangerous implications for Jews. I’m very happy to be writing again for @tabletmag: tabletmag.com/sections/news/…
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It’s not every day you can say you’re on three @netflix shows at the same time! That’s right, I play the just born baby giraffe who can’t quite find his footing in ‘Our Planet.’ Please watch ‘The Crew’ today! Then watch @CobraKaiSeries for the 10th time!
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Guys, just because it was a shitty year doesn’t mean it has to be a shitty Thanksgiving. I’ll buy you a turkey if you really can’t afford one this year. DM me your details and I’ll take care of it.
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Winni! Thanks for trying to get me fired. Couple things. The name Anoush is Persian, short for Anoushirvani, the 6th century ruler of Persia. Anoush’s last name is Norouzi, a Persian Jewish surname. Persian Jews make up .00001% of the world’s pop. I am a Persian Jew. We good?
@CobraKaiSeries In this day and age #cobrakai couldn’t find a South Asian to play a South Asia guy... #anoush
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This Halloween I’m dressing as this Phantom Sore Throat I’ve had for the past 2 weeks. Scariest shit ever.
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Imagine living in season 43 of Handmaid’s Tale. #IranProtests2022
Iranians are famous for our warmth, passion, and joie de vivre.
Talk to anyone who has Iranians in their life and they’ll agree.
And this is who has been in charge of the country. This is what the world sees.
#MahsaAmani #ZhinaAmini
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It’s fun to see what some of the most powerful people in the world would look like in a Chucky Cheese ball pit. #DemsInPhilly
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@James_Yammouni @JaiBrooks1 @luke_brooks @danielsahyounie @BrooksBeau pple keep asking why these are in my bathroom
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I wish the pandemic happened in the early 2000s so I never had to feel what it was like to get rejected from a club.
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Was that an #earthquake, or just the Coachella douchebags coming home at the same time?
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Guys. I have a friggin @FoodNetwork show! Also I say ‘friggin’ now because I’m on a family friendly network. #RaidTheFridge premieres 9/1 at 10p. Also, OMGOMGOMGOMG!!!!! foodnetwork.com/fn-dish/show…
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Anyone else have to pretend to be Afghan to get a job because the network thought Iranian wasn’t diverse enough? @bariweiss
bariweiss.substack.com/p/ama…
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PSA: When we start singing the national anthem out of our windows, lets try our best to start on a low note so everyone can hit “And The Rockets’ Red Glare.”
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So self quarantining is basically constantly checking the time and asking “is it too early to start drinking?”
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Congrats @kenjeong!! You’re a great guy, and I look forward to seeing you get crushed under a piano.
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Weinstein should be the first ever living person in the "In Memoriam" montage in the next Oscars.
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The fact that Silver wears a white gold Rolex President. It’s such a perfect choice for him.
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Here’s my parents not getting an SNL sketch. #QuarantineLife
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Today on “Green Eggs and Dan” I talk with NASCAR's @Blaney and learn the secrets of @BobEvansFarms mashed potatoes, what it's like pulling up to Nobu in a Ford Fusion, and we discuss the trials and tribulations of dating a Hooters Model. link.chtbl.com/JrTl5ZTX?sid=…
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Listen to Paul F. Tompkins!! The F stands for Fwisdom. #Buyjillion
Dispatch from Detroit Hotel: SAVE BAJILLION #Buyjillion piped.video/-X9E6Qxio8A
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My gym just sent this email: “GOOD NEWS! WE’RE OPENING NEXT WEEK!” Are you out of your fucking mind!? I barely wanted to go to the gym pre-Corona. What’s their slogan going to be? “Come for awful classes that make you feel fat and insecure, stay for the incurable virus!”
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Our show is in limbo because Seeso is no more. It needs to find a home. Please RT this and cc places you could see it living. #Buyjillion
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I love when Bruce Springsteen does blue collar cosplay. #SuperBowl
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One of the best parts of #Bajillion is that we’re friends with @PFTompkins now!! Best job ever. #BajillionS4
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In high school, my buddy @steingart and I would lie to our parents, head into the city, and watch @attell destroy at the Comedy Cellar. I mean, tears pouring down, uncontrollable convulsion laughter. He is 100% the reason I got into comedy.
nytimes.com/2019/03/20/arts/…
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I’ve never been more proud to be Iranian-American!! Welcome to REAL flavor country, @GuyFieri !!
Watching @GuyFieri eating Ghormeh sabzi at Tasty Kebab in El Paso, Texas. Velcome to Amrika! “Strong flavor. Big flavor. Memorable flavor... I’ve never heard of it. I’ve never seen. And I’d definitely eat it again.”
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For real! Nobody could squeeze big laughs out of mediocre lines like you. You’re amazing! Also, can I borrow $20?
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“Green Eggs and Dan” is the #1 FOOD PODCAST IN THE COUNTRY!!!
Thanks to my amazing season 1 guests, @hasanminhaj @iliza @MichelleButeau @SklarBrothers @PFTompkins @ScottAukerman @paulrust @jordancarlos @mattkatz00 @Kulap @healdrules @annielederman @jordancarlos @TrondyNewman
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In honor of the release of season 5 of #CobraKai Sept 9 on @netflix, I speak to co-creator of the series, @jonhurwitz (Harold & Kumar, American Reuinion). We discuss White Castle, a wine debacle with Ralph Macchio, and an amazing season 5 food spoiler. podcasts.apple.com/us/podcas…
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Time for our nightly “ask Alexa how many people have died” session. #QuarantineLife
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Dear @Delta, as someone freaking out and flying right now, lucky enough to be in First Class, here’s a tip. Please tell your flight attendants to not be scared of telling the entitled pricks not wears their masks (most of the people in First) to wear their fucking masks.
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SO excited to make this little dream a reality. I finally have a Food Podcast!! We have an insane lineup for season 1. @hasanminhaj @MichelleButeau @iliza @paulrust @SklarBrothers @healdrules @ScottAukerman @Kulap @jordancarlos @mattkatz00 @annielederman
This New Podcast Lets You Take a Peek Into Celebrities’ Fridges (EXCLUSIVE) wp.me/p2WgDE-1jqNly
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Having my name in THESE lights was my first professional dream. Still gives me goosebumps @thelaughfactory
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Congrats @ScottAukerman !!!!! Watch #BetweenTwoFernsTheMovie on Netflix now. DM my cousin @joubgab for his Netflix password.
Okay! It’s finally here! BETWEEN TWO FERNS: THE MOVIE is out worldwide on Netflix! netflix.com/title/80243600?s…
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Saudi women can drive!! Good job, Saudi Arabia. Welcome to the 21st... er... 20th... um... 19th century!
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I was always jealous of friends w/ kids because they had a perfect out to get out of annoyingying plans. And then the words “self quarantine” fell into my lap.
🎶 “And then a hero come along...”
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Cobra Kai fans! This is where you realize Louie and Anoush are the same on screen and off. Comedian
@BretErnst and I discuss first hating each other, then loving each other, then eating our faces off together in Atlanta while shooting
@CobraKaiSeries link.chtbl.com/gR9lxM7K?sid=…
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Guy dreams his whole life of hosting a show on the @FoodNetwork. Literally the day it happens, he loses his taste and smell. Didn't Kafka write something like this?
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#CobraKai closed in on nearly 2 billion minutes viewed on Netflix in the first full week after its Season 5 launch on Sept. 9, as the streaming audience for Amazon’s #TheRingsofPower and HBO’s #HouseoftheDragon dipped. bit.ly/3Cz0Egj
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Thank you so much @vulture!! Fantastic review of my new food podcast “Green Eggs and Dan.” vulture.com/2019/08/this-wee….
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Cobra Kai premiers tonight on YouTube Premium at 9p PST / 12p EST. THIS SHOW IS INSANELY GOOD!! The cast and creators are top notch in every way. Humbled to be #TeamMiyagiDo.
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“I have a dream, that ONE day, people will use my speeches to sell trucks to rednecks.”
-MLK
#SuperBowl52
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Shout out to all the guys wishing a “Happy Thanksgiving” to all the girls they used to hook up with, to see if a future hookup is still an option.
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Typical Friday. Wake up, have breakfast, hang out with a gold medalist, no big deal. @gabrielledoug
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