@iDKHOW (Not using E-Lawn Twitter anymore. Head to Bluesky)
Salt Lake City, UT
- Tweets 11,406
- Following 142
- Followers 302,917
- Likes 4,482
Hey.
Y’homophobic? Y’transphobic? Y’hate people based on race or religion? Y’misogynist? Y’bully people for any reason?
Change, obviously.
Also, don’t follow me, or listen to my music until you change that stuff.
The end.
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A lot of y’all are pressuring me a lot lately to add preferred pronouns to my bio. I see you, and I understand that’s important for you, but I personally don’t have a pronoun preference. And pressuring me to do that feels uncomfortable. Apologies if that offends anyone.
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Friends, y’all can 100% stop being upset when people credit me as ‘ex-panic’. It was my life for nearly a decade & I’m proud of it! It’s part of my résumé & It’s not a bad thing at all! This message brought to you by the Dallon Weekes Foundation. The end.
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Please do me a personal favor & don’t attack anyone else/other fans on this stupid fucking website. I’m so tired of the way we treat each other. Music is supposed to be fun & bring people together. Can we just treat each other with kindness for like a day? Today? Please.
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For the last eight years I've had the incredible opportunity to perform in Panic! At The… instagram.com/p/BdNsc2DAbI6/
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I dunno, guys...Sometimes I feel like the fashion industry doesn’t even WANT 6’3” grown men to have sparkly pants.
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Vine is coming back!? That’s great, I’ve been wondering what teachers at school be like.
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Me, a regular internet dad, hiding under the bed:
Armed Robber: ...
Me: ...
Armed Robber: ...
Me: ...
Armed Robber: You’re under the bed, aren’t you?
Me: I am.
Say, these viral memes are fun! I get why you kids like them so much!
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I guess you could say that if you want to keep your job, it’s probably not a good idea to be a bigoted, misogynistic piece of shit your entire life.
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Remember Kids; No matter how good of a person you are, or aspire to be, somebody is going to be bound and determined to hate you. But don’t stop. Some people are only happy when they’re miserable. Let them be just that.
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Uber driver is a big ‘ol misogynist. Had to ask him to stop the car and let me out. Gross.
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Me: I might feel a little silly doing a puppy interview.
Y’all: DALLON HATES PUPPIES AND THINKS PUPPIES ARE CHILDISH AND HATES EVERYONE WHOS EVER DONE ONE AND HE ALSO WANTS TO POISON ALL THE PUPPIES!
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Gonna tell my kids that I love them both very much.
(This has been a meme, but I put a fun little ‘real dad’ twist on it. Enjoy, everyone!)
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The people who are mad that I listen to Cardi B, remember one very important fact: I don’t listen to Cardi B.
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Years ago, a construction crew I worked with joke gifted me a set of pink tools. Their way of implying that I was ‘gay’.
THEN they’d get mad that I actually used them on the jobsite every day!
I still use them! Pink hand tools!? Are you kidding me!?
Fools didnt know me at all.
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@tylerrjoseph @joshuadun You boys broke a lot of road safety laws in your vid. Im not mad, but If anyone ever sees it, you could get tickets
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Before you and your pals get together to film that hilarious Instagram skit, remember: Don't ever do that.
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One time @tylerrjoseph & @joshuadun asked me if I wanted to be in the hamster ball for their set. I said no. #crazyoutrageoustourstories
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If youre not into something (An artist/movie/song,etc) "This sucks" is about the most pretentious thing you can say. Its ok not to be into something, but let other people enjoy things! Remember that your opinion isnt as relevant as you (or I) think! (This is about The Last Jedi.)
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I used to think that crazy ol' Don Trump was simply a pile of human garbage with no redeemable qualities whatsoever. I also still think that
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Police have tracked down the dudes who stole all of our stuff. SO they can either bring it all back and we can forget the whole thing, or they can get arrested. Keep your fingers crossed that they do the right thing.
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It’s dissappointing to see critics disparage fan bases that are mostly made up of young girls. My daughter is 12. She knows WAY more about whats cool than I do! They drive and shape culture more than they are ever given credit for. Listen to them.
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One time the @waterparks boys were being all “healthy” in front of everyone, so I did a butt load of one handed pushups to show them who’s boss. #crazyoutrageoustourstories
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If you try and film your viral video while I’m shopping at Target, I will 100% ruin it, on purpose.
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‘Choke’ video facts: I had planned on moving around more during the “performance”, but the stage was only big enough for the drums, so I had to stay in that one spot, or I’d fall off. I’m big.
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Only thing we weren’t able to recover was my laptop and iPad and backpack. But the hard drives and backups with all our songs are safe and sound! I’ll buy that for a dollar!
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Well intentioned young person at the parade: Does your son want a tiny flag?
Me: Oh no, Thanks. He hates America.
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I’ve been in this business long enough to notice that the hardest part about working for any band is pretending that everything the lead singer says is clever.
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I think that the scary clown from ‘It’ would make a great Halloween costume this year. Nobody take my idea.
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Dear @USPS
When your guy comes to deliver a package, but doesn't knock, or ring the door bell, but DOES just stand there for a minute before leaving a 'Failed Delivery Notice'...On. Camera.
That = Less effective.
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Remember when that guy stole the album, my hard drives, and all our equipment, and then he got found and put in jail, and we got everything back?
Ha!
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I’ve never been on ‘vocal rest’ before. I haven’t said a word for like 12hrs. I may just do this forever.
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Can’t sleep. I don’t know what to do or say, other than keep signing petitions, and staying angry.
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It’s weird to see people with successful music careers complain about not getting an award, or not getting a #1 spot on whatever chart.
You have a job making music! You already won, dum dum!
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Wanna be in a rich & famous rock band? Want to party all the time, & live that good old fashioned sex drugs & rock n roll lifestyle?
Then good news!
Now, YOU can put your guitar down, and fuck off instead!
(If you just wanna make music, then great! Come join the rest of us.)
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I’m not allowed to eat any of my daughters gingerbread house. Apparently it contains “Daddy poison”. My one weakness.
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Wife's rainbow sweater. Dark grey sweatpants. Big 'ol Caterpillar work boots. This may be my best Dad outfit ever. I've really outdone myself on this one.
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Now y'all are sending me gifs of Zac F. Ron, who I assume once played a character named 'Troy'.
Never heard of 'em.
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I’ve submitted three different DNA testing kits to @Ancestry and now they say they need a fourth one. So, either my DNA is untestable, or they are making Dallon clones.
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Dear Tik Tokkers in the band DM’s offering to use iDKHOW songs in exchange for money:
Nah.
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Ok, Greatest Showman is fantastic! Singin’ dancin’ Wolverine, Zac F. Ron, Zendaya, The entire cast! Really great
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What’s the worst part about a regular 9 to 5 job?
My picks:
1: Having to ask for permission to pee.
2: When your boss doesn’t realize that you don’t care about ‘The Company’, and that you’re just there for the paycheck.
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Neighbor is playing music too loud, but he likes cool stuff. So, this is actually kind of nice. End tweet.
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Four lost bags, three flight delays, two missing basses and a partridge in a pear treeeeee. Hi, Europe.
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I hadn’t thought about it until recently, but for a long time I think I fell out of love with music. I wasnt listening like I used to, but within the last year it seems like I always have something spinning now. I missed feeling this way about music. It’s pretty flippin’ magical.
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I saw the coolest IG post today. This guy had a stack of money, & then get this, he takes the money & he puts it up to his EAR and starts talking LIKE IT WAS A PHONE! But it wasn’t a phone, guys! It was money the whole time!!! He must have a lot of it & always will forever.
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My neighbor just called me a nerd and threatened to kick my ass. Apparently I close the dumpster gate too loud and I never say 'hi' to him.
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If my devices are constantly listening to me, then why don’t I ever get any ads for everyone shutting up?
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My wife just gave me a really good lyric. I think that means she gets 5% now. Although, she also gets all of my other percents anyway.
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Just saved a bumble bee's life. No big deal or anything. I mean yeah, it was dangerous, but I guess I'm just a really good person #humblebee
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Not only will I never do an 'April Fool', but I will also actively try to ruin any and all April Fooling that I happen to come across.
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When a pilot announces that someone on your flight has a peanut allergy, everyone puts them away. We’re all still 100% free to eat peanuts, BUT we don’t, because that choice could lead to an actual death.
Wear a mask, get vaccinated.
& eat your peanuts later.
Everyone wins.
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I just heard my song on @altnation for the first time! Can’t stop smiling. SO cool!
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If a huge company refuses to help out a customer & is incredibly rude in the process, is it ethical to tweet the number/email of said companies offices & encourage followers to politely ask them to help? Or is it better to just encourage followers to never use them? Asking 4 me
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Looking for a fun, not at all boring way to show society that you’re no square? Try saying something totally outrageous like ‘Hail Satan’! That’ll show ‘em! For more punk rockin’ tips like this one, follow this account!
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I know about deez. I know about bofa. I even know about bofa deez.
I know about Candice, and all the rest of your little tricks & teen slangs. Your Gen Z memes & your TikTok island boy Fortnite video game dances & your Dan Fogelberg cassette tapes.
You have no power here.
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It feels strange saying ‘happy’ anything right now, but I hope that this #PrideMonth will, at the very least, be an exceptionally positive and productive one for everybody. 🏳️🌈
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Dear nerds,
‘Rise of Skywalker’ was great!
Quit complaining about things that are awesome.
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