stay-at-home son. loving uncle to three beautiful cats. all around chill hang. he/him
Burbank, CA
- Tweets 15,055
- Following 5,451
- Followers 15,634
- Likes 238,833
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hiiiiii it's me! a classic centrist liberal! i'm here to log on and remind you again i have no vision for a better future! everyone who hates me is actually stupid, and the more i tell them that, the better i feel! this is working! i am the good guy?
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practicing a little dutch for my trip to amsterdam and there is no way this language is real
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just put in my notice at work and my boss was like, "oh, so do you have another job lined up?" and i said, "no. i just don't want to work here anymore." and reader, when i tell you how loud the silence was after that....
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walz's couch joke is actually genius because to offline normies it just sounds like he's calling vance lazy, but in order for conservatives to explain what it *actually* means, they have to give so much insane context that they come off as unhinged
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why did we replace harmless white lies with therapy talk? i don't need an essay about how you're setting boundaries so you can't make it tonight, just say your stomach hurts
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i don't think this happened because you know the gay guy who did this would NEVER stop talking about it
Armie Hammer reveals he tried hooking up with a man through Grindr because 'gay dudes have it so easy’ and ‘women are the worst’:
“I tried hooking up with a dude one time. It was hilarious... Because I was like, you know what? Like, women are the worst. Gay dudes seem to have it so easy. Like, so easy. I'm at a restaurant, my phone blows up, and it's, like, Grindr, and someone else is like, 'I'm at the same restaurant. Do you want a b****** in the bathroom?' And you're like, 'Hey, guys. I'll be back in five minutes.’ Okay, this could work. This could work. Yeah. Let’s try this.' I remember I started making out with him, and I just remember being like, God! Beards! Oh I get why women like it when you shave! Like, this thing is f****** rough. Like, how do I get in there? I put my arms around him and I was like, ‘Oh my God! And these shoulders are so wide! He’s so big! He’s almost my height. Like, this is so strange.' It did physically for me absolutely nothing. Nothing, like, not even a twitch. He reached for my d*** and I responded, ‘You’re not going to touch my flaccid p****. Like, this is not going to happen.’”
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luigi mangione looking right down the barrel of the camera to look at you, the viewer, right in the eye
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oh he's the type to say "i'm almost there" and then he blocks you on grindr
Joaquin Phoenix has dropped out of a gay romance movie five days before filming was set to begin, with a source telling Variety that he got “cold feet.”
Sources tell Variety that his role cannot be recast, the crew is now out of work, and losses could exceed seven figures.
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can someone explain to me this type of gay man:
-works a high stress job with long hours (doctor, lawyer, etc.)
-unbelievably ripped and jacked
-vacations all the time
-goes to the clubs every weekend
like where do they find the time? the math isn't adding up
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one of the funniest parts, besides this being dumb, is that it would somehow only cost $20 billion
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me in the middle school locker room having an inner crisis because i might be faggot
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a video of someone calling people fa**ots was left up for hours because she was a conservative politician, why would advertisers want to associate with this garbage lol
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turns out posting racist memes and making the economy worse isn't great politics! who knew?
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blah blah blah west germanic languages are closely related etc etc let me have fun 🙄
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tim walz introduces himself as "tim." however, our records show in 1964 his birth certificate lists his name as "timothy."
can you REALLY trust a person who can't even be honest about their own name?
In his 06 campaign, Walz boasted “that in 1993, he ‘was named the Outstanding Young Nebraskan by the Nebraska Chamber of Commerce for his service in the education, military, and small business communities.’”
But he wasn’t.
Via @elianayjohnson
freebeacon.com/democrats/for…
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my trainer (straight), unprompted: so have you heard about this app, sniffies....
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"i'm a top btw" "i'm a bottom btw"
ok, but have you tried being a beacon of joy that enriches the world for everyone they meet???
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i love the gay mating ritual:
1) follow someone hot on instagram
2) he follows you back
3) you like one or two of his recent posts
4) he does the same
5) both of you are afraid to make the first actual move, so nothing happens
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ohhh you're a gay guy wearing a jockstrap to the gym? should we tell everyone? should we throw a party? should we invite helix studios?
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just voted no on prop 50. literally everyone else at my polling place was voting no. no is definitely gonna win.
honestly, if you're kinda busy and don't have time to vote no, don't worry about it!
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this isn't relevant but i love how he's casually drinking gatorade from a glass bottle while wearing booty shorts and crop top
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this thirst trap is dedicated to the man last night who told me i should consider getting a tan before i take off my shirt in public
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a bunch of alabama boys staying at my hotel because of the rose bowl. time to fire up the grindr machine and see how many dl boys i can corrupt with my los angeles lifestyle 😈
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no, you're not a sexy baby.
you're a 36 year old accountant at deloitte who has too many plants and a drawer full of jockstraps you'll never wear.
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ohhhhh my god u were condescending to a stranger on grindr today? should we tell everyone? should we bring some ketamine? should we invite austin wolf?
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extremely attractive man asked me to come into his room with his room service order
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gay twitter isn't real life. you can still be sexy and desirable without vacationing in fire island/ptown/palm springs
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if these dylan o'brien clips came out 8 years ago, the tumblr servers would explode
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what's a fiber supplement i can take that doesn't let the world know i am a raging homosexual
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why are the saddest, gayest losers dragging up a cute couple's photo from two months ago to be nasty about? gay incels are actually so pathetic
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my household cannot stop talking about how problematic this dynamic is...he is essentially a child!!!
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he pushes so sensually and looks at you with these lustful puppy dog eyes as you tumble down each step
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the press finally realizing the american people hates republicans and likes it when you're mean to them
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everyone pray for the gay sex workers in milwaukee this week, they're gonna have a lot of weird shit to deal with 🙏
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iirc, the characters before the surgery are supposed to be plain and unremarkable (not ugly) but view themselves as ugly, but joey king is definitely not plain?
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crazy that some thought this was a straight character, this is the phrenology of a man who knows how to wrap his lips around a ****
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i get it if you're rich and don't have a real job but these are the ones i need to explain themselves!!
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