Hey twitter peace and love.

Some kid at my local Grocery Store was saying "POGGERS" out loud in the cereal isle, so I told his mother it was a racial slur, safe to say he ain't touching his xbox for a while.

She said yes, I guess im getting married.

The truth.

Who the fuck is joji and why is he number 1 trending?

How it started: How it's going:

Happy Pride Month 🎉 ❣️ 🏳️‍🌈

Changed my body from the way God made it, It reflects my altered mind.

People who say "POGGERS" out loud and in public should be beaten and lynched.

The Paul brothers are finally going to do incest porn.

Man America... you guys are FUCKED UP!

The pope is horny

Epic pewdiepie hits 100mil! CAN WE ALL AGREE THAT THIS IS EPIC?

Thank fucking god I was bullied.

Sent PewDiePie a picture of my cock and balls for Christmas, what do you think he'll respond with?

God damnit, these numbers are so close.

Thank you everyone, it's been a great ride but unfortunately I am leaving the internet forever, I'm sorry to let everyone down but there is nothing else I can do, I'm getting arrested for having the smallest cock in the world 😔

All I see on Twitter now is "normalize this" and "normalize that" Bro shut the fuck up, normalize my cock and balls.

not poggers america

Bit of a rough one past couple weeks, my Father sadly lost his battle with cancer, but he had a beautiful service and hilarious casket, rest easy Dad ❤️

I’m kinda liking this new just chatting section

I would unironically let James Charles suck my cock and balls.

office was robbed, 20k in stolen shit... delay on podcast maybe...

The SpongeBob timbs stay ON during sex.

Apparently Jake Paul and Tana just got engaged... Please don't let them fucking breed, for the love of God I hope Jake or Tana can't have kids.

Hey America, elect Kanye west as your President, it will be funny.

MY PENIS IS NOT SMALL!

All jokes aside, being fat isn't lit, I constantly promote the idea of staying confident in yourself and being comfortable in your own skin, but being overweight is NOT FUCKING HEALTHY, and I constantly struggle with health issues due to it, so please take care of your body.

If this guy bought twitter, everything would be better.

They put me on the local news, kinda funny.

Morning everyone!

Whenever I see H3H3 or Keem in my news feed.

Do you accept?

Does Ninja still have Ligma? .. be honest

Logan Paul is a pussy

This is lit.

If you're a retail or fast-food worker, and your ass is working Christmas Eve or Christmas night, and those corporate assholes ain't giving you holiday bonuses, drop me a work selfie and your PayPal Merry ⛄ 🎄 Christmas

Logan Paul fleeing back to his mansion in Puerto Rico to avoid prosecution and enjoy is 4% tax brackets on money he’s stolen.

I wonder who the first YouTuber to get Corona will be... anyone wanna start placing bets?

If you make tiktoks like these, I literally fucking hate you, eat shit.

Alzheimer's Channing Tatum: Is my name Jeff?

Unbothered. Relaxed. Moisturised. In My Lane. Focused. Flourishing. 🌸♋️

What the fuck did I do this time?

Hehehe no wonder Pikachu gave that look, Bulbasaur Bill Cosbied Butterfree.

It's safe to say our new internet was fired shortly after this.

Just tested positive for being a sick cunt.

Can we please fucking delete YouTube trending page.

So kids are next maybe? I'm just saying... id make a GREAT god father, congratulations <3 you both look ready to take on the world together!

Just thinking about what mods I should ad to Minecraft 2

Wow epic my close epic personal friend felix kjellberg aka PewDiePie stopped by the office for a visit today, I wonder what mischief we're gonna get up to hahahaha EPIc!!!!

About to end this fool.

Look at this absolute poon destroyer

- Retail &/or hospitality workers, please tweet me your PayPals and a selfie at work! I know Holiday season sucks big ass and y’all don’t get paid any extra for putting up with the horse shit that is Christmas shopping. Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas & Hanukkah 🕎 RT Pls

Don't get me wrong, YouTubers boxing each other for money is awesome... But when can we get YouTubers having sex with each other for money????

Sometimes you just gotta appreciate your mates cock

..... Oh

I fucking hate Minecraft stans, literally eat shit morons.

Fish be like where we dropping boys

This is my Son Konkrete. He loves drives with his Dad to the pet store for treats.

Skate 4... SEX

fucked a girl so hard her pussy said poggers.

I just tested positive for cringe!

I accidentally deleted my bio and forgot what it was, the most liked reply can be my new one. Good luck!

LOOK AT MY LAWYERS DAWG!

This heroin bussin, sheeeessshhh!!!!

Y’all watching way to much porn.

Hey, I'm just gonna be honest for a minute here, women literally be shopping.

the amount of fans I’ve had the pleasure to meet over this past year has been a blessing and heartwarming experience, I can’t believe how many of you mfers watch our shit and are so involved In my life I’ve only ever wanted to entertain and bring joy and laughter to other people’s life on and off camera and I hope people who know me can attest to that However when I was younger I said and did some edgy stuff online to impress a community that I thought I needed approval from for some stupid sss reason I said some horrid racist and sexist things on stream because it made a chat move quicker and made me feel like it was entertaining. When I inevitably got banned for the shit I was saying it broke me completely but looking back at it now it was a good thing , Because it forced me to take a step back and think about what I was saying and the impact it had on not just myself but people watching and even the people around me. Making vids and especially live streams it can be hard to seperate what’s proformancr and what’s real but I absolutely said those things and hurt people, including friends around me, I think an apology to all them is long overdue, I’m deeply sorry It’s been 7 years and not a day goes past that I don’t look back on those days and absolutely tear myself up inside, but thankfully I’ve surrounded myself with good people loved ones and friends and family and the last thing I want to happen is for my younger self’s stupid mistakes to effect those who helped me understand and learn to be better I know getting drunk on camera isn’t exactly changing the world but getting to meet some of you legends over the past year has made me so thankful that I left that shit behind me and I feel like I owe you guys some accountability for being as stupid as I was. I’m not proud of myself yet but im proud of what we’re making and I am proud of the team I am privileged to share walls with and call my friends. I want to thank you all for watching my stuff and from the bottom of my heart I’m sorry for being the selfish dumbass I was, I think the doctors took out the critical thinking part from my brain

Just witnessed a small Chinese lady say “BINGCHILLIN” life is complete.

Just wear a mask and wash yo hands morons, it's so simple.

Serious Tweet: Is laying in bed at night with suicidal thoughts normal?.. yes Can you do something to stop these dark thought? ... my experience with this, sadly no. Can you seek professional help and reach out to people around you for help? YES! Did this help me? YES!!

Man Twitter is actually just hell on earth, I can't express how much I hate looking through this app and seeing the kind of people that use it, I wish Twitter wasn't a requirement for me to connect with the people that follow me.

Quarantine got me confused... Am I really lonely or just really horny.

The amount of money I would pay to see a Trump tweet right now.

Listen bro they just got fucking married, what do you want me to say???? I'm trying to behave here dumbass.

Can Logan and Mayweather just shut the fuck up and have sex with each other already, its pride month! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

Dang, thanks for reminding me tinder....

Office was recently robbed again, the prick made off with 30k+ in camera and filming equipment. I am on the edge!

Battery vape be like

i dont care what anyone says, Ricegum be conducing straight political and corporate espionage to access the networks of financial, defence and technology companies and research institutions in the United States.

First PewDiePie ... Now Jack? Guess it's my turn

Did you read a Bible or something? You wrote dis tracks on your brother, abused women on camera and marketed gambling to kids, but now you're spreading "love and positivity??" Shut the fuck up you blithering ape.

Pissing in the sink is so liberating, fuck the patriarchy.

I’m Japanese now.

Bro shut the fuck up no one likes you.

I'm not getting older, kids are just becoming more retarded.

im gay

All 2020 women know is shopping with their friends, eat hot chip, twerk, lie, be bisexual, charge they phone and make onlyfans.

lmfao the pricks that robbed us came back for round two, our intern had to fight them off.