hard launch mondays
- Tweets 39,932
- Following 342
- Followers 6,024,286
- Likes 6,029
Me: When I make a video about my sexuality at some point it’ll be pretty low-key y’know
Dan: Hold my pride flag- *45 minute masterpiece later*
6,396
34,104
200,529
Sat eating dinner when suddenly someone’s poodle jumped on the table and started licking Dan’s face??
7,076
17,185
145,938
For real Dan has worked so hard on this video!! Super proud of him and the messages it sends 🏳️🌈
1,510
13,877
142,728
I felt it was time to share this as hopefully my story will help! Coming Out To You - piped.video/UqXFKSWniVU
11,958
23,031
125,769
Happy day of birth to @danielhowell! Here’s some faves from my camera roll this year 🎈🎈
2,669
11,559
104,568
Merry Birthmas @danielhowell! Here are my fave pics of you from my camera roll this year 🎈✨
2,816
12,162
99,014
My phone just loudly rang while I was already pretending to have a conversation to avoid talking to a taxi driver so the week is off to a good start
3,482
7,453
98,361
I get so confused when Americans explain their school system to me it’s like pre-garden, kindergarden, half school, mid school, eagle academy, elementary prep, high school, higher school, eagle prep, college, kinder college
1,154
4,101
94,180
3,500,572
Did the inventor of the bicycle seat ever actually see the shape of a human ass?
502
3,747
90,467
3,698,134
I'm in LA and a woman is complaining about the hotel breakfast not having 'fresh honey'.. did she want them to milk the bee in front of her or something?
3,305
6,893
86,095
My dad got an Alexa and politely says good morning to her every day so she won’t kill him in the robot uprising
2,898
7,388
84,417
Bartender in Mumbai just pointed at Dan and asked me “Sir, how old is the boy?” he literally thought Dan was my son
3,934
10,835
81,121
Dan found his new video so exciting he fell asleep while editing it! Get hyped guys
5,229
22,765
77,963
if you've ever been into dan and phil you might want to be online in an hour or so
3,505
4,156
87,664
14,460,847
what’s up with these 72 and 96 hour deodorants? please have a shower if you can
537
2,583
79,564
2,847,830
my birthday stream with dan raised over $83,000 for the palestine children’s relief fund!! and i now have an eyebrow slit.. thank you all for being such a kind/chaotic audience 💜🎂
768
9,616
79,578
5,562,329
Dan somehow accidentally introduced himself to someone as Phil today so I guess we are now Phil and Phil
4,697
11,459
76,342
My neighbour just had a baby and instead of congratulating her like a normal human I said ‘well done on the baby making’ and then saluted wtf is wrong with me
3,138
5,490
74,189
A lady just dropped a whole tray of iced coffees in the park so some ants are about to be CAFFEINATED
2,272
4,706
73,239
Happy birthday @danielhowell! Here is a photo of you gracefully losing at Mario Kart 🎈🎉
3,433
20,091
72,235
I wasn't at London pride yesterday but seeing all the photos and support for the community has made my heart very happy 🏳️🌈
1,733
4,961
72,541
gonna confess i’m still not sure what the ring from lord of the rings actually did except make you invisible and angry
502
2,657
71,576
10,691,447
I wonder if dogs prefer being called cute names like Fluffball or weirdly human ones like Gary
3,570
6,304
71,277
Happy birthday to @danielhowell! Here’s some of my fave pics of you from my camera roll 🎁🎉🎈
2,706
14,423
70,496
Delivery man: nice hair
Me: thanks I just got it cut
Delivery man: i said ‘sign here’
Me:
Me:
Me: *moves to antarctica*
2,355
7,912
67,751
I bought my fish a tiny plastic leaf to rest on and I will now spend the rest of the weekend staring at the tank until he sits on it.
2,555
3,855
67,311
Today someone told me that they sleep without a pillow and it has disturbed me to my core
3,253
4,413
63,760
Arrived at an Airbnb and this is above my bed. Can’t wait for an evil witch to eat me in my sleep.
3,927
3,541
63,261
Got an email from someone called Lester Phillips. Not sure if I should fight him to the death or marry him so he can become Lester Lester
2,551
4,932
62,823
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANNYBOY! Here’s some of the most flattering pics from my camera roll this year 🎉@danielhowell #happybirthdaydan
1,000
5,585
64,023
I thought I was playing Fortnite alone but realised I accidentally chose ‘duo’ when a stranger shouted HELLO through my speakers and I had 6 actual heart attacks
2,692
7,278
60,518
why did I think this was real for a second
dan and phil attending Barbie (2023) world premiere
ALT dan and phil in their 2015-2016 The Amazing Tour Is Not On Fire look, shiny gold tuxedo with a top hat each to match, they are jumping with joy. But the image is edited to put them at the recent Barbie world premiere, and their gold tux is now bright pink to match the movie
366
1,972
60,706
2,056,050
why is putting on shoes so embarrassing i always end up sat on someone’s hallway floor fighting for my life as they’re trying to say goodbye to me
476
3,409
60,395
1,966,086
I’ve been in hospital all day as I fainted! (I’m ok now) Dan is convinced I got abducted by aliens as I don’t remember it happening 👽
5,551
4,696
59,078
Just accidentally said ‘incest’ while trying to say ‘I don’t mind insects’ so that’s how my day is going
2,581
8,364
57,798
Starting with the dog’s face was a bad idea it keeps looking at me like ‘father why did you make me this way I am in pain’
2,578
7,391
57,397
Trying to think of a cooler backstory for the large cut on my leg rather than ‘I accidentally walked into an open dishwasher’
3,704
3,491
58,134
I miss the cinema so much I might get Dan to sit behind me in the dark and loudly crunch on some snacks
1,182
2,560
58,429
I was sat in the cinema about to watch 1917 and the person next to me asked their friend what year the movie was set in
1,630
3,671
57,505
No but seriously imagine it:
.@MCRofficial and @falloutboy will headline the 2024 When We Were Young Festival in October.
See who else will take the stage: rollingstone.com/music/music…
1,900
9,393
57,928
4,276,250
Turns out the 'weird smell' in our hallway wasn't the old carpet but apparently we've had a gas leak for FOUR YEARS. Glad I don't smoke! 😅
4,635
9,324
53,907
Time to film Dil's Wedding! I'm going to try not to cry 😭 instagram.com/p/BKL-mmlABLY/
5,296
15,156
53,404
A lady went to the toilet on the plane and when she got back her boyfriend said ‘I missed you sooo much’
She just went for a wee not to war Tommy
2,569
7,102
54,331
As a kid I was so excited about becoming an adult and having midnight snacks whenever I wanted. This slice of toast is for you tiny phil
2,676
7,805
53,439
Some child outside is screaming that he can’t take a pigeon home. Just let him adopt the damn pigeon Janet
2,760
9,188
53,017
hi i'm phil and i'm a terrible flat mate who steals cereal and leaves kitchen cupboards open and i deserve to live to leave in great shame 🙈
3,874
13,425
53,060
I saw the front door opening and assumed Dan was walking in so I just greeted an electrician by shouting ‘HI RAT’
1,042
2,996
54,306
Why am I so weird?? my neighbour started to leave their apartment at the same time as me so to avoid talking to them I tried to quickly dash back in but my door had closed so they just saw me spin around and bash into my own closed door then turn around again 😬
2,710
4,716
52,613
Just said a sofa was ‘so comfy it makes my ass clap’ and apparently I don’t understand what that phrase means
2,560
2,947
52,893
Me and my brother just got mistakenly called 'sir and madam' on the train and now we're trying to figure out who was madam
1,747
10,296
51,487
HAPPY 10TH BIRTHDAY TO MY CHANNEL! 🎈#10YearsofAmazingPhil it'll be off to college before I know it 😮thanks for all the lovely messages guys!
3,369
19,294
50,546
I ordered Mexican food and when the delivery guy knocked on the door I stood up so fast to open it that all the blood left my brain and I almost fainted into his arms. He’d have thought ‘wow this guy must really love burritos’
2,049
6,484
51,000
Dear Phil of 5 mins ago: DON'T ACCIDENTALLY PUT A METAL FORK IN THE MICROWAVE. Love from a thankfully still alive Phil of the future x
6,170
10,460
50,539
For a year I’ve been releasing all the bugs I catch in my room into the same bush outside so it’s probably a horrifying insect battle royale in there now 🐞🔪
2,422
2,848
51,006
I heard a couple arguing outside my window so I opened it to have a cheeky look but they saw me and I banged my head on the frame in shock 💀
3,948
8,476
49,515
For a second I got really excited that I could wink with both eyes at the same time and then remembered blinking was a thing
4,838
12,548
49,423
Sad smol blue fish news.. our beloved betta Norman has passed away. May he swim in peace 🐟💙
3,419
2,322
51,130
Just went to see the White House with @danisnotonfire! Hopefully Obama will come to the show tonight.
2,919
11,261
48,711
Helping Dan film a sketch and I gesticulated so hard that I punched a suitcase. Hopefully my injured fingers will be worth it for his video!
2,393
9,780
48,838
At breakfast in a hotel this morning I helped a woman rescue her crumpet that was stuck in the toaster and she called me a ‘true hero’. Looks like there is a new avenger in town
2,396
5,950
49,504
Just got an xbox message saying ‘nice playing today man :)’ and I felt all wholesome until I saw their name was CatPiss19
1,764
3,049
50,025