Reader, writer, talker. Co-host of The Graham Norton Book Club. Patron of the Cambridge Literary Festival. Board member St Patrick’s Centre.
Kilkenny, Ireland
- Tweets 24,889
- Following 3,024
- Followers 12,283
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Quietly pleased with my look for the niece’s wedding. Until the teenagers christened me Paddington 😬
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For 12 years, Dad and I remembered my mum on 14 December, the day she died. Swanky dinner and lots of booze: Rules was his favourite. Carrying on the tradition without him, and a photo of when they met as cruise ship crew. The best parents.
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Perhaps telling everyone who disagreed with you to fuck off and vote Tory wasn’t such a great plan, you condescending bunch of pricks.
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My brilliant dad Tony died earlier this week. Lover of jazz, gardens, wine, cooking, West Ham; raconteur extraordinaire, restaurant manager and non-retiring waiter. And, in the words of a wonderful nurse, “babe magnet”. Love you, dad.
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As a woman in her 50s looking after her elderly father, you can imagine, @giles_fraser, how I felt when I read this. Love is not, in fact, everything: I also need the NHS, staffed by many people who have moved to this country, to diagnose and treat him.
Freedom of movement and social mobility undermine family life which is the most successful form of social security the world has ever known. unherd.com/2019/02/why-wont-…
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I always hoped to be the kind of woman who walked into a room, discarded her fur and was handed a Martini and a party Sobranie. But it seems I’m the kind who can fix the lawnmower. Ah well.
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Because I’ve just come from @hayfestival, I wonder what it would be like to have a Culture Secretary who tweeted her support of extraordinary arts events like that, and hundreds of others, instead of this nonsense
There were far, far more cheers, but that doesn’t make a good headline does it.
Queen’s thanksgiving service: Boos and jeers for Boris Johnson outside St Paul’s
thetimes.co.uk/article/f096c…
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My dad’s funeral today. Waved off with the theme tune to Top Cat, Thelonious Monk and buckets of New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc. Good lad.
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A no doubt unpopular view: I have started reading the @jk_rowling book. It seems an important step before condemning or condoning. Especially when this has all been started by the Telegraph, a paper now apparently dedicated to fuelling hatred.
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I woke up in the small hours and thought: suppose there was a massive celebratory reading of Judith Kerr in which children were taken for sausages and chips at night, and all the proceeds went to helping child refugees? Could that work?
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People literally kept from their loved ones’ deathbeds. Unimaginable pain and sorrow. The contempt they have for all of us.
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Hello, I’m also a person in a film and when I argue with my partner I grab a pillow and sleep miserably on the sofa, despite living in an eight-bedroomed house
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Oh, markets, home and abroad. You go on holiday, everyone goes insane finding out when “market day” is, you go, it’s the same load of old tat on a wallpapering table.
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.In many ways, *this* typefies what the problem with public life is. Adonis came from the working classes, the child of an immigrant, spent some of his early years in care - but his views are dismissed because he goes *skiing*???
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See, this is what I don’t understand. The overwhelming majority of people who watched last night found it absolutely joyful. Nobody cares that it wasn’t a “contest” (subjective in any case). People are just delighted. Why is that annoying to you?
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OK, before I “move on” (to 60,000 deaths, care homes, PPE but yay let’s go shopping) I want one lobby/broadcast journalist/LOTO to ask a Columbo “One more thing”:
Why do the Spectator accounts and Monday’s statement flatly contradict each other?
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Here’s my dear dad (mouth open), who died a year ago today. He’d advise #stayingathome with red wine and Miles Davis
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No, Nadine, I haven’t, & I’m one of those very people. But perhaps that’s because I’m currently caring for my sick father & navigating through a Health Service that your party has desecrated & vandalised, and for which you should all be held to account. You won’t be, of course.
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OK lads, here's what I don't understand: they're either the great unwashed or the metropolitan elite, commonly understood to bathe in asses' milk and Penhaligon scent. Which is it? Also: if it's a rent-a-mob, where do I get paid?
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Oh. Apparently coffee, staring out of the window and making a list of enemies doesn’t feature.
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Dad in Rules on his 80th birthday. He died just short of 81, two years ago today. We have celebrated with an enormous amount of squonky jazz and red wine. I miss him, but am so grateful to have had him for so long.
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1. Grow up
2. You can’t even see half their lapels
3. That’s not how you spell remembrance
Only one poppy in sight on #rememberanceday . Says all you need to know about the Labour Party
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You would think that Naga Munchetty had been wearing an Impeach Trump T-shirt and announced that she was joining Ilhan Omar’s campaign team, instead of giving a very restrained reply to a question she was asked. Ridiculous and just wrong.
The outrageous treatment of @BBCNaga exemplifies a media that wants Black faces but not black experiences. That ultimately fails both as an effort in diversity - they want to look different and act that same - and journalism - she's been reprimanded for telling the truth. Shame.
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I have married someone who thinks it’s appropriate to post a picture of me with no make-up on. However, this is 54. Wonderful presents include a cheese refrigeration device, circular knitting needles and a frying pan. As I said, this is 54 ❤️❤️❤️
Happy birthday @AlexClark3, writer, broadcaster, gardener, bin-obsessive, and, clearly, Ireland's most patient woman.
All the ❤️💚❤️💚❤️s.
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Just to note that @NicolaSturgeon is a super-keen reader who promotes and celebrates books and I humbly suggest this is a greater attribute in a leader than being good at PE.
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On Monday, I postponed an interview because I had a bug, but said I’d be back to rearrange soon because “it has the feel of something short and sharp”.
Naturally, it is double pneumonia.
In hospital, doing great, fantastic health pros and excellent drugs. More soon!
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I may never leave this @NandosUK. They have provided hot food and red wine to a woman who has just left her dad in the vascular ward after a three-site, multiple doctor, 14-hour odyssey of the South Coast. Everywhere else was closed. They said: “large glass, madam?”
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I’ve never said this, and I bear Giles no particular ill will. But when my dad was dying I had an in-print dust-up with him about care of the elderly. I recall being surprised that he offered no word of sympathy; it was all about the argument.
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But it wasn’t incoherent. It was the opposite, which is why people have responded. And because we love people who are gifted with the language, which DD is, despite him not using a vocabulary or register that TS approves of. nitter.app/timothy_stanley/status…
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I remember when my dad was dying I would see triumphant govt stories about the NHS and feel like I was going mad. Lying is an unutterable extra cruelty to patients and their families.
"Right from the start we've tried to throw a protective ring around our care homes. We set out our first advice in February... we've made sure care homes have the resources they need" says Health Secretary, Matt Hancock.
Read the latest on #COVID19: trib.al/260MwD6
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Listening to the radio in the car, girding my loins for Lidl:
Ryan Tubridy to quizzer: “Who’s is this voice?”
[clip of @Nigella_Lawson saying “microwave”]
Caller: “Jeez, it’s yer wan!”
Ryan: “Yer wan! That’ll do!”
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What about what's right? What about Remain-supporting Labour supporters who feel utterly abandoned?
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So, after a day of utter shit (dad howling in pain, me losing it with a GP’s receptionist and then weeping in front of a truly wonderful occupational therapist), we have tucked into a Waitrose wine box and are *actually quite cheerful now*. We slog on.
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God, the bliss of middle age.
“Have we seen this Lewis?”
“Yes, but I can’t remember who did it.”
“Brilliant” *presses play*
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I'll throw in a few about my partner's family, too. The older generation emigrated from their country of origin to find work, so that they could, you know, eat. Alas, things aren't quite as simple as you might think.
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My int. with the great @prodnose
Danny Baker: ‘I’m not someone for brooding indoors and then doing a think piece’ theguardian.com/media/2017/o…
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Grateful to @unherd for giving me chance to respond to @giles_fraser
What does it cost to care? @AlexClark3 considers @giles_fraser's essay on family. unherd.com/2019/02/how-freed…
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Update: I met one of the care assistants in the car park. She looked after dad when he first went into the acute ward. She is Polish. “All the luck to the daddy!” she said. “I have the fingers crossed!” ❤️
As a woman in her 50s looking after her elderly father, you can imagine, @giles_fraser, how I felt when I read this. Love is not, in fact, everything: I also need the NHS, staffed by many people who have moved to this country, to diagnose and treat him.
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Please don’t hate yourself. You absolutely did what you believed and had been told was the right thing to do. So many others did the same. I’m very sorry for your awful loss - please do mind yourself.
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How are people more worked up about Donald Tusk than about the threat to epilepsy drugs and cancer therapies? How? What the fuck is wrong with people?
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How quickly you get to the nuts of it. Combined position of PM & JHB is that if you say you fancy a fat woman, you’re a) lying and/or b) a creep. Where that leaves us sexually active rumpy-plumptresses, I do not know.
How hilarious that @JuliaHB1 and @piersmorgan think I'm - me, Old Father Porn - virtue-signalling about fancying the big woman on the cover of Cosmo. Fuck body positivity, she's hot. And I'm prepared if they need it to show them my browsing-history.
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For comparison, @NicolaSturgeon was actually there, not only speaking but buying books. The president of Ireland came to our local literary festival last year. It can be done.
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Oh, I think worse: not having lifted a finger during the campaign, not fighting Brexit & yet basking in adoration of youth vote (Remainers). nitter.app/youngvulgarian/status/…
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If @Pret don’t have a Centrist Melt sandwich on the menu by tomorrow, I don’t know what to tell you
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Oh my goodness. I’m overwhelmed by all your lovely messages. Thank you so much. Despite being a very unassuming man, Dad would have loved them ❤️.
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I kissed the cats and the bloke goodnight and went to bed with my novel. I closed the door. Then this gross invasion of privacy.
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Friends, I've organised a charity storytelling evening in support of refugees on 21 March. Please book here: refugeestories.eventbrite.co…
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Wrote about my dead dad *again*. Sorry. And if anyone doubts grief makes an idiot of you, I've just got lost coming back from the supermarket.
How my late dad’s impounded blue Skoda became a proxy for my grief | Alex Clark theguardian.com/commentisfre…
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So perhaps you would care to have me on one of the @unherd podcasts? I'm a very experienced broadcaster, and I have *many* insights about care, health and sickness to share.
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Once a year, my dad and I have a blow-out in memory of my wonderful mum, who died 11 years ago today. Thank you, Otto's, for playing host this year. She would have loved it.
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You can’t quite see the hosing Irish bank holiday rain here, but such is my devotion to @Nigella_Lawson and her 40 cloves of garlic chicken that I am making a dash for that pot of thyme NONETHELESS
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On a lighter note: we had sausages that wanted eating up. After, we remembered half a pineapple in the fridge. I cut up some cheddar. We have been to Abigail’s Party for our tea.
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.Sure, if you’re talking about what are now called “optics”. But is he to pretend he’s not the person he is? I’d have thought it’s pretty clear he’s behaving in what he believes is the national interest - exactly what people admire Jeremy Corbyn for.
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Last time I was home was Jan 7, and when I saw this view, I had dad with me. But it’s wonderful to be back.
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Preparing to leave the house at THREE AM for @CheltLitFest. First plane, first live non-virtual events for seven months. Heels! Lipstick! Hosiery!
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Endless rewarding of terrible behaviour. It makes me very sad, because why should anyone try to act decently any longer?
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Nice bit of misogyny from @DailyMirror for a Saturday morning. She's 68 years old, you pricks
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What a night. Career highlight for me. Thank you all so much for coming, thank you to Ted and his ace team, @4thEstateBooks and, of course, the incomparable Dame Hilary.
Triumphant night @southbankcentre listening to Hilary Mantel speak with such candour & insight with @AlexClark3 about the decades long conversation with Cromwell, breaking all her writing rules to do justice to his end and how it has left her more hopeful. #TheMirrorandtheLight
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Not angry: just asking you to make clear the difference between chlorinated chicken (to counteract poor food prep standards) and chlorinated water (to prevent spread of waterborne disease) to your thousands of followers.
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AA Milne was the master of bringing small animals to life. But he remained human.
Arthur C Clarke was the master of intergalactic space fiction. And yet he lived on earth.
JK Rowling is the master of wiza-- *bangs head repeatedly on keyboard*
Jane Austen was the master of the marriage plot. But she remained single. wapo.st/2AZdtDr
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No, but it doesn’t mean you’re emasculated either. In fact, it doesn’t mean anything apart from that it’s comfortable.
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Dad surrounded by love tonight. So much so that he turned to us and said, “Girls, would you like a drink?” We’re fine, we said. “Thank you so much,” he said into thin air, “We’re fine right now.”
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This, up and down the country, over and over again. It’s so sad it takes your breath away. And these chancers just issuing their bullshit, meaningless statements.
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(the interview is by lucky me)
In this week's @guardianreview -the first, world exclusive extract of The Mirror & The Light, Hilary Mantel's final Cromwell novel. Plus an interview with Mantel, and authors including @MargaretAtwood and Colm Toibin share their favourite Mantel books.
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Pub talk, last night. New TV drama in which Uncle Boris from McMafia and Corky from Night Manager revive and go into business. Massively loveable rogues, constantly drunk and on the pull, actors hamming it up wildly. BAFTAs all round.
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This is very belated, but THANK YOU ALL for the amazing, prolific and utterly appreciated wedding wishes. They were all so lovely ❤️Below a picture of the bridal entourage, in beribboned Mini Cooper, dog not pictured, at the McDonalds Drive Thru shortly before the ceremony
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Morphine. A tuna sandwich. Some tea that I doubt passed muster. He’s OK, and I can breathe out. Thank you @HSELive
Adoring millions, RELAX! Your leader has survived the "procedure". A bit sore, but the quacks say it went well, and they're going to observe me for 24 hours. Now, onto the legal highs... 🏨😍🚨💉💉💉✊
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Hello! If you are within a 100-mile radius of Bath, could you please come to many events? Because I haven't slept a full night through since February and I want to think it wasn't all for naught*
*art, culture, literature, music, meeting of the minds too, of course
The Bath Festival opens tomorrow, and we couldn't be more excited!! Kicking off the festival is the incredibly talented Amanda Palmer at @TheForumBath
If you haven't got your tickets yet for any of the @Bathfestivals events, then book online now at bathboxoffice.org.uk/whatson…
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Me: Do you think I can persuade you to eat cauliflower?
He: Is this what it’s come to? Drinking our own urine?
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Love also to the receptionist at the Malmaison (I just needed a little pop of luxury, Twitter, don’t judge me; and it’s near the hospital) who said to me: “You’ve had a tough day. I think we’ll give you a sea view. I know you might not see it, but it’s there.” ❤️❤️❤️
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This shamed me. I think Sarah is a really conscientious writer and thinker attempting to navigate very difficult territory and consider all people’s needs and rights. I don’t for one minute think she’s transphobic, and if I did, I wouldn’t support her.
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I’m being totally straight here: do you honestly think it likely that that was the only option? And do you think thousands upon thousands weren’t in the same situation and found an alternative?
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Big pre-Xmas bank hol DIY weekend here in the ROI. Expert on radio: “Be careful with the grey, lads. I passed a house this morning and they nearly had their children painted grey.” Wise words
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Find yourself a boyfriend who sends you this when you cautiously tell him your big piece seems to have gone down OK. Thanks for making the tea when I was gnashing my teeth with anxiety, @dannykellywords
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Made an excellent impression on Eimear McBride, her publishers and the Southbank team by running in breathlessly and explaining how I’d left my wallet in Ireland and had been living on toast and pencils for the last two days. Onward and upward.
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On this note: I have also read Martin Amis’s book. I realise this approach will not catch on.
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Imagine if @ManBookerPrize 2018 was won by a book that addressed male violence *and* the island of Ireland, in this year of all years. I am so delighted.
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Morning! Rousing if heartbreaking thread from excellent @Harkaway nitter.app/harkaway/status/853862…
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Oh good God, how wonderful.
‘It is the book I never thought I’d be well enough to write. So this is all the more extraordinary’
Susanna Clarke on winning this year’s #WomensPrize for Fiction for Piranesi 👏
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When the beloved Sue Townsend died, I remember saying casually to her publisher that there should be an ST comic writing prize. I mean it’s obvious, I’m not a genius. I still think it & doubt I’m alone.
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The entire point is that the government were telling the country - quite rightly imo - that there were no blurred lines; that the rules had to be followed to the letter for the sake of everyone. It’s the sense of furtive exceptionalism that’s so outrageous.
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