i teach people cs piped.video/voocsgo contact admin@elusivemgmt.com
Vancouver, British Columbia
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Neo: GOAT of cs1.6
S1mple: GOAT of csgo
Donk: GOAT of cs2
Zywoo: GOAT of hitting every boring awp shot
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ropz: “people look at me like i’m s1mple, zywoo, or donk, but i’m not.”
ropz as soon as its a grand final:
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coaching has to be the most stressful role in CS cuz sometimes you just have to watch while your players make the dumbest decisions in human history
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Team Liquid:
- Last tournament was 5th place
- Started 0-2
- Lost to G2 in 1st game
- Playing Astralis to get into playoffs
Cloud9 Boston 2018:
- Last tournament was 5th place
- Started 0-2
- Lost to G2 in 1st game
- Played Astralis to get into playoffs
just saying
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ranking countries based off how much they deserve to host the next major (0 bias)
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a guy with 12 hours in cs just posted a knife tierlist on reddit and it's 10x more accurate than 90% of skins enthusiast tierlists
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did someone on the valve dev team get married on vertigo? is it someone's kids' favourite map? how is overpass out before vertigo?
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i'm really torn between how much i dislike faze clan and how much i like their cs team and all their players
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2015: cs is dying
2016: cs is dying
2017: cs is dying
2018: cs is dying
2019: cs is dying
2020: cs is dying
2021: cs is dying
2022: cs is dying
2023: but no actually this time
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CSGO just updated the Terms and Conditions to say if you cheat they get ownership of your house. gg
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NIP losing to Anonymo in OT with lag then barely squeeking by in 30 rounds on a perfect connection is exactly why a replay was a travesty. The teams were close, the game was close, NIP got 2 chances to win. bullshit.
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. @launders ruined Christmas for my daughter.
We were watching BLAST together, because she wanted to watch her favourite player Zywoo. Mid cast, Launders says "Spoiler, Santa isn't real." I didn't think much of it, but when I looked over, she was crying.
thanks launders.
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astralis: who should we replace blamef with?
dev1ce: sign my bro gla1ve
astralis:
Astralis sign br0 as device takes over as IGL hltv.org/news/38370/astralis…
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cheat as a 7 year old: permaban
throw in a small tournament: permaban
literally cheat in a valve sanctioned event: it's complicated
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intentionally doing this is closer to cheating than getting the coach bug once for 1 round and not reporting it
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science based csgo tip: when you feel the urge to pee, your reaction times are faster. hold it in to gain an advantage on your opposition. (this is actually real, not a meme)
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When Dev1ce said NIP were 7 steps ahead of Astralis, he meant in terms of getting knocked out of events.
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sorry to elige but this is absolutely hilarious. i think it says something like "baldness chart"?
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twistzz on losing to VP: "the day after I had to go meet my girlfriend's parents for the first time. I remember at about 08:00 when she woke up I told her I never went to bed. I was just laying there for 9 hours thinking about losing to fucking Qikert"
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Career “Big Events” with a 1.40 or higher rating:
Niko: 4
S1mple: 10
Zywoo: 11
Donk: 11
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teams meeting rn to decide if they should swap back to cs1.6 or keep playing cs2
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IGL Ratings in 2023:
Electronic: 1.11
Gla1ve: 0.98
arT: 0.97
Snappi: 0.96
Apex: 0.96
Aleksib: 0.94
Nafani: 0.94
Nitro: 0.93
Dexter: 0.91
Karrigan: 0.87
Hooxi: 0.86
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Twistzz became what everyone feared. His eyelids disappeared, his head swelled and his ears started bleeding. "You ok Russel?" asks karrigan. "I've never been better finn, I see it all now, they're not going A or B. Theyre going home" he said before rushing A and killing everyone
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bubzkji on astralis: "they told me i would be the 6th man but really i felt more like a 3rd wheel."
he added: "every time I entered a room in the facility they would stop talking and stare at me. I think they were talking about me."
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so basically if you play downscaled you can force pixel gaps on almost any smoke in the game
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just caught how close s1mple was to actually killing ropz in their 1v1 at the major final
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Santa *was* real, but in 2018 @launders shot him down over the East coast of Canada because "his movement is so trash i just can't watch"
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missed a shot? subtick
missed a nade? subtick
got 1 deaged? subtick
your teammate is throwing? subtick
barista ruined your order? believe it or not, also subtick
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immediately after losing the grand final twistzz turned to karrigan and said "NACS wins those" before removing his faze jersey to reveal a liquid jersey underneath
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don't let this distract you from the fact that Faze Clan closed out a 15-10 lead lead in the CS:GO Antwerp Major Final Giving NA their 2nd major
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give the average cs2 hater cs2 but with csgo graphics and there’s a 100% chance they start talking about how much better it feels
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kids these days are too spoiled. they never had to hold drop on cobble or ladder on train and it shows.
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the date is December 31st 2025, Stewie2k is now a content creator and makes his request for 2026: "all I want for 2026 is 128 tick MM servers..." As the clock ticks over to midnight, Gaben makes an announcement: MM servers are being changed to 32 tick.
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whether you prefer Valorant or you prefer CS, we can all agree that League of Legends players are mentally ill.
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