If you assemble enough people wearing Patagonia vests, a venture fund spontaneously forms around them.

South Beach
When a bootstrapped competitor is growing faster than your venture funded company nitter.app/Meich/status/128598237…
136
3,477
16,026
web3 founders trying to find a real problem to solve
Fifty Shades of Whey
83
730
4,542
MBA students when registration opens for the “Intro to Venture Capital” course nitter.app/welcomet0nature/status…
48
396
4,057
What the IPO landscape looks like for late stage tech companies:
75
469
2,808
When solo founders pitch customers but use third person pronouns like: “our product” and “we are looking forward to working with you”
Mr. Drinks On Me
78
775
2,602
The pitch deck The data room
21
219
2,457
10x Venture Capitalists LPs, if you come across this rare breed of fund manager, immediately wire your commitment. Having a 10x VC in your portfolio significantly increases your odds of actually beating the S&P 500 OK, here is the $1B question: How do you spot a 10x VC?
44
421
2,185
Remember when founders could get away with not including numbers on their charts? Those were good times.
18
181
2,000
Founding CEOs: I'm irreplaceable VCs when growth slows: nitter.app/richardiii/status/1720…
9
185
1,926
328,198
Startup founders be like
21
207
1,781
Why remote work is the future in two pictures: What ~$1M gets you in Utah (near SLC) vs in SF
56
285
1,804
VCs investing in no-code startups
The Bad Game Show
24
204
1,589
Raising a bridge round “Pre Series A”
8
64
1,428
Mary Meeker may be the only person in history to convince VCs to read a deck with over 300 slides
11
158
1,374
There are some early warning signs that your child is going to become a VC. Parent: "Want to come to this birthday party?" Child: "Who else is going?"
19
126
1,313
The Stanford MBA to PM pipeline remains undefeated
9
82
1,259
Glad to see that the mayor of Miami has figured out how to speak VC
12
15
1,198
When VCs brag about an exit in their portfolio
5
68
1,186
VCs when they see a company raising a bridge round
12
139
1,161
How founders feel when their VCs try to renegotiate term sheets and then tweet that they are “open for business”
Adi
20
126
1,156
society if all VCs were actually as helpful as they claim to be
27
105
1,117
Flight attendant: Is there a doctor onboard? VC: *raises hand* let me know how I can be helpful Dad: *facepalm*
17
72
1,122
VCs announcing their latest fund size:
20
109
1,100
What goes in your Twitter bio is one of the most important decisions you can make as a VC. This flowchart should help
20
142
1,061
Easter Sunday on VC Twitter
13
67
1,036
Ways VC could actually add value: An in-house designer focused entirely on designing fundraising decks for portfolio companies raising a follow on round.
35
50
947
After being on VC Twitter for a while, you are able to categorize most tweets into a set of categories. Looking at the last 24 hours of my feed, here’s a thread of the types of tweets I saw.
26
136
927
As we approach the end of the decade, we took a moment to highlight the top VCs going in to the 2020s
24
105
918
This but for Patagonia vests and venture funds
So my working theory is that if you assemble enough enterprise software ads, an airport spontaneously forms around them.
15
63
908
When Silicon Valley VCs visit “emerging markets” and discover how low the valuations are
15
91
914
There's a reason why VC firms love hiring former product managers for junior VC roles. PMs are used to: * not having any authority * being in meetings all day * writing long documents to justify their decisions * mastering organizational politics
16
58
918
Please cue the big acquisition VC Twitter playbook: * Shock & Awe from industry observers * Congratulatory tweets from investors who boast about how great the founders are * “We almost invested” tweets from VCs who passed * Breakdowns of why this was a genius move
16
68
907
VCs: “Our firm is open for business” * As long as your company has $10M in ARR and willing to take a $5M valuation
13
48
904
|-------------------------- | | BEING A FAN OF | | @STRIPE's LANDING | | PAGES AND EXECUTION | | ABILITY IS NOT A | | PERSONALITY TRAIT | |--------------------------| (\__/) || (•ㅅ•) || /   づ
24
45
906
Being active on VC Twitter is a core part of being a venture capitalist, but many VCs don't know how to participate. This flowchart should help.
23
111
896
MBA students when a top VC firm posts an opening for an associate role: nitter.app/chaselyons/status/1275…
14
61
873
Founder: “How much revenue do we need to raise a Series A” VCs:
An Auburn Man
9
82
859
VCs tricking first time founders by putting the option pool in the pre-money valuation
Lo Mejor Que Verás Hoy 👏
13
85
860
Request for Legal Tech Startup: A chatbot that only charges you $350/hr to tell you that “it depends”
17
66
846
I can't believe this website is free.
19
45
863
When the lead investor in a round backs out
David Howard
10
125
840
VCs when an early Stripe employee updates their bio to “working on something new”

ALT stampede GIF

12
36
837
This is a little know fact: In Silicon Valley when two companies backed by the same VC clash, it is customary for the legal teams to respond in iambic pentameter and the matter is arbitrated through a poetry slam.
16
155
827
Increasingly convinced that MBA programs are actually just a clever financing mechanism for burned out consultants to take multiple international vacations
12
49
819
I can't believe this website is free
9
41
814
VCs pivoting into climate tech investing in 2020 after seeing top funds announce their interest in the space
21
130
792
Stop talking trash about different VC firms Sequoia is LEGENDARY Benchmark is ICONIC a16z is PROLIFIC Founders Fund is FRIENDLY Softbank Bedrock is CONTRARIAN
20
57
746
"Humbled" to introduce the "Things VC Say" bracket. In a crowded field of VC-isms, what is the one to rule them all? (A thread with polls)
33
98
734
when investing in startups, it’s important to invest in good ones and not bad ones
when starting a startup, it's important to make good decisions and not bad ones
25
41
735
VCs explaining how they were crucial to building a billion dollar company: “So the key insight we figured out and executed on that let us win the market was ...” Their actual involvement:
Aviator Anil Chopra
18
87
700
Subject: Mediocre Ventures <> Your Co From: associate@medicore.vc "We'd love to schedule a quick call to introduce you to the ways we can help your company grow. Even if you're not fundraising right now, it'd be useful to connect for the future. Here's my Calendly link"
23
70
630
When experienced founders get cold emails from associates:
12
54
654
Helpful investors on your cap table are worth their weight in gold
12
99
635
How can you tell if someone runs a remote first company? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.
15
46
630
📍”We’re an early stage firm” | | | _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ \ 📍being the first check | _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ / | | | 📍 asking who else invested
4
35
624
Live footage of investors at YC Demo Day trying to meet companies raising at under a $15M pre-money valuation
BuzzFeed News
9
92
600
People: “We-“ Silicon Valley VCs: “Actually, WeWork isn’t a tech company and it’s not even based in Silicon Valley”
8
58
606
ⓘ THIS CLAIM ABOUT BEING HELPFUL IS DISPUTED
2
24
597
Someone asked me if I'll ever run out of VC parody material but after reading this thread, I'm more concerned that the VCs themselves will beat me to it
10x engineers Founders if you ever come across this rare breed of engineers, grab them. If you have a 10x engineer as part of your first few engineers, you increase the odds of your startup success significantly. OK, here is a tough question. How do you spot a 10x engineer?
8
43
571
I can't wait until people start using "oversubscribed" in casual conversation "Sorry. I'd love to come but I'm oversubscribed" "Your charity looks great but my wallet is oversubscribed" "I can't have another bite. My stomach is oversubscribed"
8
36
581
Peter Thiel's purchase of a remote New Zealand farm in case of pandemic certainly looks prescient in hindsight
12
30
568
Going to try this with twitter. If you’re a VC, founder or journalist, DM me your thoughts on the Away piece and I’ll anonymously post your response here (and I’ll commit to keeping your identity confidential)
17
90
551
Founders & Employees (interpretive dance, 2012)
Jed Bridges
3
40
550
Family offices trying to get into the sidecar SPV when they hear that Sequoia is investing: nitter.app/singareddynm/status/11…
12
47
539
Broke: layoffs Woke: layoffs + integrity blog post Bespoke: layoffs + integrity blog post + $200M fundraise at a 2x higher valuation
11
48
531
When engineers from Google start a company
5
27
506
You: [says literally anything] VCs: That reminds me of one of our portfolio companies, that does [something tangentially related]
9
29
513
Which company is going to be the first to arbitrage the desire to be a “Product Manager” by renaming every role: “Product Manager - Customer Success” “Product Manager - Engineer” “Product Manager - Business Operations”
18
24
513
How to spot a VC in SF: ✅ Gray Patagonia Vest ✅ “they are in the Developer Tools Space” ✅ “Proliferation of SaaS” ✅ “Stripe, Plaid, Twilio” ✅ Struggling to explain what an API is (OH near Jackson Square)
11
21
498
Founders trying to raise a family, build a billion dollar business, and run an early stage fund of their own all at the same time: nitter.app/CucumberTonic/status/1…
8
51
506
Telling founders to “make the UI pop more” does not count as value-add
10
46
479
It turns out you don't need to travel to the center of the universe to discover a black hole. Just try sending a deck to the "Submit a business plan" email listed on a venture firm's website
6
37
496
VCs giving founders detailed design feedback
1
40
479
Your periodic reminder that saying "I knew that startup wouldn't work" is not that insightful considering most companies fail
9
38
478
I never thought VC Twitter would a new frontier for art, but here we are.
7
37
468
Trying to fix a business with negative gross margins in the middle of a crisis nitter.app/Alpha_Taurus_/status/1…
10
63
464
Branding Consultant: “How would you best describe what you do here at XYZ Ventures” VC: “We turn boat money into yacht money“ Consultant: ”Right. So maybe we will just go with ‘Back world changing founders’ then”
9
36
454
Request for startup: if someone says “new normal” during a call, they are automatically muted for the rest of the call
20
49
453
When you are the co-founder of a health tech company that sold for $2B and are about to get into a Twitter fight with an influential VC (Sound On)
8
19
471
VCs to LP: Our deep technical analysis and data science produces novel insights and deal-flow. VCs on Twitter: Which companies in the serverless blockchain space should I be talking to?
6
53
465
VCs on Twitter be like
6
36
458
VCs on Twitter: "Can the Nevada election results come any slower? What kind of shop are they running?" VCs emailing founders: "Sorry for the delay, we're still waiting on some due diligence. Let us know if there any developments in your raise."
5
32
449
VCs congratulating each other like
Overtime
8
34
450
Local founder shocked to learn that the YC Alum who offered to prep them for their YC interview just happens to run a small fund
8
12
460
Founder: We really need to reduce our churn to get the valuation we want. PM: You got it boss!
i was trying out the Dave app to see how it worked. this was probably the craziest account cancellation step*s* i had ever gone through.
13
38
445
WFH Flex Ranking: 1. Idyllic outdoor garden backdrop (bonus points if you apologize for the occasional bird sounds) 2. Packed bookshelf backdrop with Caro biographies 3. A DSLR with a good lens and soft lighting 4. Keeping your camera off the whole call
17
27
447
Now @TheOnion is getting into VC parody too
Silicon Valley Leaders Sit Down With Wildfire At Investment Meeting After Being Impressed By Its Rapid Expansion trib.al/DXK56hF
11
23
437
Advertising that your company is in YC Startup School is the startup equivalent of adding Harvard to the education section of your resume because you once enrolled in an online “executive leadership” workshop.
10
36
429
What board meetings are going to look like for the next few months.
14
28
431