My sister’s boyfriend passed out while she was giving birth yesterday and when he woke up, one nurse said “ you just had to make it about you”😭😭
952
16,729
384,724
8,897,210
The little boy I babysit just found out I get paid for watching him and and he locked himself in his room & will not talk to me..lil bro thought I came voluntarily to hang out😭😭
969
10,297
262,263
6,734,317
My 13 year old sister posted on snap “sucks to see someone enjoying the man you built” my mom beat tf outta her lmao
987
8,069
227,962
8,140,794
Black churches are so funny omg😭.The pastor said “we gon be here to 4pm” this old lady said “you gon be here by yourself”🤣🤣
371
7,540
131,953
2,122,456
My sister and her boyfriend broke up this weekend, so we’re at the mall returning the gifts she bought for him. The cashier was like “wrong size?” why my sister gon say “wrong ngga”😭
346
2,932
66,243
915,696
I always call my daughter “baby girl” and now she telling people I’m her baby daddy. No baby! It doesn’t work like that🤣🤣
449
2,189
49,512
1,275,692
My mom spanked my son and then he goes like “imma tell my daddy”. My mom said “tell your daddy, that’s my son. I’ll whoop his ass too”😭😭
89
540
9,641
120,614
Met a prostitute that said she’ll do anything for $50……guess who just got their front porch painted
103
311
6,551
94,798
Without naming your job, tell me something you say 20 times per day at work
3,176
139
4,123
3,605,814
I told my daughter “girls aren’t tough” and this lil kid pulled out her loose teeth right in front of me. I’m crying😭😭😭😭
75
159
3,655
35,962
Yall pray for my cousin, she just found out her sugar daddy was her biological father lmao
190
139
3,579
81,342
This Chinese guy in the supermarket didn’t know how to say chicken so he grabbed an egg and went to the cashier & asked “Where mother”🤣🤣
98
408
3,433
279,101
I was taking a walk w my 12 year old daughter and we saw a handsome construction worker. My daughter said “I don’t know what he fixes but mine is broken”😭
132
95
3,165
59,486
I remember running from a fight in 6th grade, my grandma said “either you fight him or you fight me” I whooped her ass that day lmao
108
194
2,685
60,180
I got a girl pregnant in high school so I told my parents I was getting bullied and we moved outta tha neighborhood lmao
81
72
2,603
59,501
When I was 7, I prank called the police and they actually showed up to my house. They ended up arresting my cousin who sold drugs😭😭
68
84
2,580
36,207
My cousin stole her baby daddy phone when he was asleep and was going through his messages. I heard him say“when you done make sure you cry outside, I’m trynna sleep”😭
87
187
2,387
59,097
Some dude asked a girl out in the restaurant and she started crying and said “am I so ugly you thought you had a chance”😭
100
77
1,909
29,377
You’re offered $100,000 but if you accept it, the person you hate most in the entire world gets $200,000. Are you taking it?
639
46
1,890
233,034
If I ever get on my knees to propose she better say yes cus that uppercut gon be crazy coming from tha floor up
81
224
1,569
39,780
Black people notices 2 birthdays on the same day and be like “damn it’s everybody birthday today”😭
43
171
1,471
121,596
The cops just pulled up to my car and my lil brother told them “my brother got that same gun”😭😭
69
80
1,393
25,773
The earth would be a better place if yall was more concerned about pedophilia rather than homosexuality
47
193
1,268
139,131
Someone broke into my house last night and got me mad asf cus all they stole was my remote control & they keep running pass my house changing the channel when I’m trying to watch tv😭
86
47
1,156
20,486
Kids be saying the most random shii ever. I told this lil boy that I like his outfit and he was like “yeah, my mom beat tf outta my daddy last night cus he be cheating”😭
65
60
1,139
76,888
In black families , when all the juice gone everybody swear they only had 1 cup😭😭
35
151
1,146
220,092
You are given $1,000,000 to hide a paperclip from a detective, he has 7 days to find it. Where are you hiding it?
228
22
1,111
79,609
starting a job feels like you’re a new character on the ninth season of a tv show
46
89
1,032
15,513
I wonder if judges be laying in bed like “I ain’t even have to give him 40years fr”😭
54
114
899
77,660
If I ever become a surgeon, before every surgery imma whisper to the patient “Don’t worry….first time for both of us”😭
57
55
834
279,757
Yall, I just watched my blind uncle microwave four birthday cards thinking they were pancakes😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
83
39
799
14,619
Black families say their goodbyes and then stand around talking for 30-40 more minutes😂
43
93
777
14,173
My kid sister just saw pictures of our grandma’s 8th birthday party and asked why she didn’t invite her😭
41
22
606
17,620
Who’s the most popular person ever to live? You ain’t allowed to say Micheal Jackson
235
14
536
46,238
My ex posted a pic of her and her newest boyfriend on Facebook & the caption was “ain’t he handsome” and my mom commented “no not really”😭
50
30
522
12,638
When a baby falls…
White people: Henry are you okay?
Black people: Don’t look at him, he gon cry
49
29
439
10,945
I once stole chicken nuggets and put em under my hat. Saw some ladies and took off my hat to speak to them and loads of chicken nuggets just came falling out😭😭
67
12
418
9,928
CNN said the world is $217 trillion dollars in debt... who tf we owe? The Decepticons?
76
41
404
20,647
Jobs call you 7 months later like “Are you still interested” btch I’m homeless now😒
38
35
375
10,853
At my funeral take the bouquet off my casket and throw it in the crowd to see who next
51
50
369
14,342
Fellas, if you break up with your girl and the next day she wins a 600 million dollar jackpot…..you mad or you don’t care?
99
15
343
22,252
If you realize your new born baby has down syndrome right after birth,you keeping him or nah?
99
7
280
42,710
Do yall also have strict parents tha let you do some stuff, like they’re selectively strict😭
37
24
258
89,821
How small do these burgers have to be? Especially if they on tatar tots. 🤯 Yall fucking with these?
16
30
259
617,436
