90s Millennial who had unsupervised Internet access in 2008, and grew up to be a polarizing deviant leftist autistic woman dual-wielding shitposting & sincerity
not a bit! i’m just like this.
- Tweets 193,454
- Following 995
- Followers 66,135
- Likes 350,296
Violence is NOT the answer. The answer is *opens history book*
uh oh
*frantically starts flipping through pages*
uh oh. oh no. no no no. uh oh
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this is how you tell the difference between laziness and executive dysfunction btw
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“MY ANXIETY ISN’T *THAT* BAD” STARTER PACK
1. leg bouncing
2. picking at your lips
3. walking very quickly
4. having two modes: GOTTA GO & WHY I SO TIRED
5. peeing! lots of peeing
6. [new notification comes in] GOTTA READ THAT N O W
7. “am i being annoying??”
8. “they hate me”
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just saw a bi person explain why they’re single by saying “women deserve better than me and i deserve better than a man”
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never stops being darkly funny to me that doctors struggle to diagnose autism while a 12-year-old bully can do it in 10 seconds flat
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i keep seeing this pic and i REALLY hope it’s not what it looks like
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how it feels to always be the one asking to hang out or call
ALT "Shrek" movie meme of the character Donkey with a pleading look on his face, which makes him look cringey and pathetic.
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Wikipedia is one of the most reliable sources of information on the Internet, thanks entirely to its culture of cutthroat oneupmanship: The way the editors gain and maintain clout is successfully fact-checking other Wikipedia users.
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customers.
ALT Screenshot of customer review with 1 star: “YES I KNOW I SAID 1 STAR. I do not like the colour yellow so I always rate 1 star so that there is less of it on my screen. THIS IS A POSITIVE REVIEW. NOT A BAD REVIEW, I AM RATING ONE STAR TO PREVENT YELLOW THANK YOU”.
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NOTHING will make an autistic person lock in like finally understanding the logic behind why they should do a specific thing
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Took me years to figure out that socializing with people who have low self esteem works best if you recalibrate to be SLIGHTLY pushy with regard to social overtures, like for example instead of “Let’s do lunch sometime” you’d say “I want to do lunch with you really soon”
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So how many Americans realize having to “do your taxes” isn’t actually normal?
Most countries’ governments figure out each person’s tax responsibility FOR them and then take it out of their paychecks automatically, without people having to do anything extra, and that’s that.
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it’s just very telling if the nicest thing anybody can say about you is that you have relatives
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ALT Comic that shows two identical scenarios where somebody wrote the incorrect solution to a math problem, except one is male and one is female; a male observer tells the man "Wow, you suck at math," whereas he tells the woman "Wow, girls suck at math."
Interesting how one pic of one female Secret Service agent is being used to insist women shouldn't be allowed to hold certain jobs but all the male agents & cops that ignored a guy on the roof or failed to secure it aren't evidence men shouldn't be in certain professions? 🤔
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lazy people should be made aware of the fact that air purifiers, in addition to removing virus-containing respiratory droplets and aerosols from the air, ALSO remove dust and thereby dramatically reduce how often you have to clean
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ARE YOU A HUMAN CAT?
- naps all the time
- needs to be loved
- done with everyone’s shit
- always wants snacks
- might want to kill everyone
- cute but will fight
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traumatized people will navigate emergency situations with calm surety but then have an anxiety attack in a grocery store
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In America, you get called trans for making any kind of medical appointment
![On August 3rd, 2021, Yeonmi Park went on the Joe Rogan Experience podcast,[6] where she discussed seeing a boy "begging for food" while his intestines were hanging outside his body.](/pic/orig/media%2FG0yzK32XEAA7EWR.jpg)
ALT On August 3rd, 2021, Yeonmi Park went on the Joe Rogan Experience podcast,[6] where she discussed seeing a boy "begging for food" while his intestines were hanging outside his body.
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even if for no other reason, you should support public transit simply because most people do NOT belong behind the wheel of a motor vehicle
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ADHD person about to make a mistake: “I’ll put my drink in the freezer so it cools faster!”
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do you ever eat a properly salted meal and suddenly understand why the ancient romans were willing to be paid in salt
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god i love the “villain switches sides and becomes adorably socially awkward around the people they used to fight” trope
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how it feels to misinterpret a social cue
ALT Line art from unknown artist: A sad, crying dog is curled up in fear as tomatoes are thrown at it.
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the way you can’t even satirize them because this is unironically the kind of thing they’d say
ALT Preview of article from TheHardTimes.net: “‘Wheelchair Ramps Are Woke!’ Screams Man Who Was Once a Child Capable of Love and Empathy”.
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finding out that neurotypical people think you’re being condescending if you use big words was truly a joker moment for me
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STOP ENABLING MEDIA ILLITERACY
STOP ENABLING MEDIA ILLITERACY
STOP ENABLING MEDIA ILLITERACY
STOP ENABLING MEDIA ILLITERACY
This is what audio description tracks are for!! We already had a solution for when people can’t see the screen!!!
Netflix execs tell screenwriters to have characters “announce what they’re doing so that viewers who have a program on in the background can follow along”
They also have thousands of micro-genres including “casual viewing” which is used for movies/TV that go down best when you’re not paying attention.
(Source: nplusonemag.com/issue-49/ess…)
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i have a corny question. and i promise it’s sincere.
is it a good idea to literally wink at people when flirting, yes or no
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doctors: “it’s not easy to diagnose autism!!”
the humble 12-year-old bully:
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“Why are we getting historically bad hurricanes, heat waves, and cold snaps almost every single year?”
“Why are so many people broke even though they work themselves to the bone?”
“Why are brain fog and fatigue becoming so common?”
Climate change, capitalism, and Covid:
ALT Meme of an elephant standing in a room, captioned “Address me”.
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how people look at me when i admit i’ve never been given an orgasm by another person
ALT Meme of Kermit the frog holding a hand against his mouth in concern.
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Somehow it never stops feeling at least slightly jarring that THESE people are the ones lecturing others on the evils of political violence. THESE people specifically.
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“why is she red”
conservative white people are more likely to end up with persistent erythema for various reasons including being angry all the time, skipping sunscreen, ignoring medical advice intended to reduce inflammation, eating too much meat, and not eating enough plants
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“the mainstream media radicalizes people’s beliefs about gender”
actually for me it began with seeing male relatives sit on their asses doing nothing while all the women and girls were running around doing all the work like unpaid servants at every single gathering
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USPS doesn’t “lose” money. It costs money. It’s a service that benefits everyone.
In a rational country, we wouldn’t even need to explain to grown adults how public services work, or why it’s a terrible idea to erode them.
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i think about this so often
ALT Screenshot of social media post in collective clown by @lennie@skull.website: “french government: we 'ave raised ze price of stinky cheese by 0.5% french people: we are on our way to parliament with grenade launchers british government: it's illegal to strike now. it's also illegal to protest. we have abolished 'hospital'. the police are allowed to spit on you british people: oh bother, how tiresome. i wonder if this was caused by genders”.
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100 men vs. actually playing the games they’ve already bought on Steam
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History class attention-payers right now
ALT Art from unknown source: Line drawing of a person sitting on a chair smiling blankly, then starting to sweat and tremble from the effort of continuing to smile instead of allowing existential dread to set in.
BREAKING: Senate confirms 48 of Trump's nominees at once after changing the chamber's rules to avoid Democratic delays. apnews.com/article/senate-no…
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you know you’re touch-starved when someone does something simple like patting your back and it feels like the sensory equivalent of lightning bolts shooting through your entire nervous system
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“Only women, children, and dogs are loved unconditionally. A man is only loved under the condition that he provide something.”
idk man i’m pretty sure all that obedience y’all demand of women, children, & dogs counts as a condition, plus the beauty standards you enforce on women
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NOTHING makes an autistic person lock in like finally understanding the logic behind why something is necessary
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Better journalism than The New York Times
How to Stop Saying ‘Jesus Fucking Christ’ Out Loud When Meeting Your Friends’ Ugly Boyfriends: ow.ly/1MKB50WmxLv
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i think asking labor & delivery staff “can you put in an extra stitch for me?” even as a “joke” should be grounds for an immediate divorce, forfeiture of input over custody arrangements, and consent to at least 18 years of alimony + child support, and i’m not joking
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we really have to share a society with people who neither understand how things work nor are willing to learn
ALT Screenshot of forum post from J Snow: “In theory, how fast could Nintendo move production of hardware to Ohio? 2-3 months?”
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y’all ever think about how if you don’t get an annual raise equal to or greater than the rate of currency inflation, you have effectively gotten a pay cut
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when you ask someone why they’re taking a zinc supplement
ALT Meme of SpongeBob smirking mischievously.
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“man-repellant makeup” this and “just bark at him” that. my strategy is to simply SJW my way into getting a guy to leave me alone
![Screenshot of SMS conversation. Incoming: “how woke r you”? Outgoing: “Well first of all, I avoid using "woke" because it's AAVE and I don't want to engage in cultural appropriation.” Incoming: “[dot dot dot] so [dot dot,] very”.](/pic/orig/media%2FG1gS8cmWYAE5KwC.jpg)
ALT Screenshot of SMS conversation. Incoming: “how woke r you”? Outgoing: “Well first of all, I avoid using "woke" because it's AAVE and I don't want to engage in cultural appropriation.” Incoming: “[dot dot dot] so [dot dot,] very”.
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I genuinely, sincerely, truly do not care whether people come here legally or illegally. And I assert that it’s weird anybody does.
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this should be the norm for all kinds of cashiers and i’m not even remotely joking
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y’all ever think about how the Democrats haven’t won a majority of the white vote since 1964, and what the Democrats did in 1965
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Nobody has EVER been more vindicated. EVER.
ALT Frames from a college-aged conservative provocateur’s TikTok in which he asks a person with a ponytail, Bluetooth headset, and leather jacket “LGBTQ rights or economic stability?” to which the person replies “Both”
BREAKING 🚨: U.S. Treasury
U.S. Treasury will now need to borrow $514 Billion this quarter, an increase of 320% from its previous estimate 👀👀
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Thinking of this every time someone uses a forehead thermometer
![Screenshot of Tumblr post from user @LydiaAngel: Furry art of a grocery store entrance that depicts three anthropomorphic wolves: One security officer, one man wearing a shirt that says "Proud American Father", and one child holding the man's hand. The security guard is smirking mischievously and pointing a device labeled "Gay Thought Inducing Rays" at the father's head, causing him to look hypnotized, as the security guard says "Welcome to BillGatesMart (TM)! Please stay still while I... [air quotes] check your temperature. Thanks for your compliance." Reblog from @MavenMemnon: "can't tell if this is political satire, legit rightie conspiracy theory art, or furry hypno fetish".](/pic/orig/media%2FG1Z7abcXAAAKg_O.jpg)
ALT Screenshot of Tumblr post from user @LydiaAngel: Furry art of a grocery store entrance that depicts three anthropomorphic wolves: One security officer, one man wearing a shirt that says "Proud American Father", and one child holding the man's hand. The security guard is smirking mischievously and pointing a device labeled "Gay Thought Inducing Rays" at the father's head, causing him to look hypnotized, as the security guard says "Welcome to BillGatesMart (TM)! Please stay still while I... [air quotes] check your temperature. Thanks for your compliance." Reblog from @MavenMemnon: "can't tell if this is political satire, legit rightie conspiracy theory art, or furry hypno fetish".
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“i feel like i lack something fundamental to being a person” so that’s autism
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platonic cuddling is great and yes i know about the accidental boners
(it’s fine. i know it’s just an autonomic nervous system response to all the close proximity and touching. your body’s reaction doesn’t make you a perv.)
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btw the reason i stopped going to therapy is because after all those years, it got to the point where every session was just the therapists praising me for saying all the right things. zero new information, ever, no matter how many times i tried going to a different practitioner.
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“entry-level” pay is a fascinating concept because there are, mysteriously, no “entry-level” bills
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conservative: “FUCK YOUR FEELINGS FUCK DEI THERE ARE ONLY 2 GENDERS BUILD THE WALL NO MORE CHINA LOL GET REKT GROOMER”
us: “wow. fuck you.”
conservative: (through tears) “wow… i can’t believe you’re being so mean for no reason at all. you’re so hateful. why can’t we be civil?”
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“Cops lie. They lie reflexively, offensively, unnecesarily, and even when easily disproved. Cops lie.”
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“You’ll get more conservative as you age!”
me, 15: we should all just coexist 🥰
me, 25: GUILLOTINE THE RICH AND BAN HOMOPHOBES FROM PARENTHOOD
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Not exclusive to autistic people, but if your life has a recurring pattern of people initially “liking you” but getting sick of you after a few months despite:
a. You doing nothing wrong, or
b. You doing much less wrong than other people get away with
...autism is more likely.
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Even if vaccines did cause autism — which they don’t — isn’t an alive autistic child better than a dead non-autistic child?
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My Roman Empire:
Illiteracy is so common that when someone online misunderstands something you said and gets angry at you for something you didn’t even say, there’s a very good chance thet they literally just can’t read.
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“If you want a living wage, get a better job” is a fascinating way to spin “I acknowledge that your current job needs to be done, but I think whomever does that job deserves to be in poverty.”
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you could probably seduce an AuDHD man by giving him clearly-worded tasks (side quests) which consistently result in direct positive feedback from you, and eventually lead to you directly telling him you’re interested in him romantically rather than expecting him to figure it out
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Rebecca Sugar has a real knack for writing messy characters and I mean that as a very high compliment
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Yes, I do think a proper understanding of feminism requires learning about the gender norms of the 1950s specifically.
World War II led to millions of men leaving domestic workforces, so women had to replace them; you can imagine how well the post-WWII male survivors took that.
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“Why don’t we build like this anymore??”
Capitalism.
1. It’s cheaper to make everything generic.
2. Bland surroundings help starve people emotionally; emotionally starving people spend more money and consume more content to try to fill the void.
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HANDY RED FLAGS GUIDE
If someone unironically says the following, ditch them.
1. “Boys will be boys”
2. “I’m not racist, but”
3. “I don’t mind gays as long as they don’t hit on me”
4. “But biological sex”
5. “Burger flippers”
6. “Illegals”
7. “It’s free speech”
8. “Handouts”
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I've said it before, and I'll say it again:
Women's historically-recent acquisition of financial rights has led to straight men collectively reeling from the culture shock of, for the first time in history, having to actually be likable to get a wife.
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“Your personal discomfort is not the moral barometer of the world” is a hall of fame adage
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bonkers that anybody old enough to remember 9/11 is falling for the old “this entire country is full of terrorists” routine AGAIN
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seduce an autistic man with this one simple trick!!
directly tell him you’re attracted to him, that you want to go out on a romantic date with him, and that this is not a joke, prank, or just being nice, nor is there additional meaning hidden between the lines
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RE-NORMALIZE THIS LEVEL OF ROMANCE!!
ENOUGH WITH THE NONCHALANCE!!!!! ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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