ALT Leslie and Brianne are passed out in their living room, surrounded by empty beer cans and bottles. Light passing through the window wakes up a hungover Leslie. She looks at the TV. An "Are you still watching "Monk"?" screen is displayed. Leslie hurls a beer bottle at the TV while yelling, "Yes, I'm still watching fucking Monk!"
ALT Brianne sees a sign that says, "VOTE HERE TODAY | VOTE AQUI HOY" outside of a building. She runs into the building, and writes in "Aqui Hoy" for President on a ballot.
ALT Leslie is wearing the "Paggi outfit meme" that was popular a few months ago.
LESLIE: Brianne, this outfit isn't even trendy anymore!
BRIANNE: That's, ah... how I was able to buy it at such a di$count!
ALT Brianne and Leslie are attempting to get seated at a restaurant, but the waiter at the front has some bad news.
WAITER: I'm sorry, but we don't have any tables available.
Brianne turns to Leslie and starts pulling a piece of paper out of her shirt.
BRIANNE: Don't worry babe, I got this.
Brianne places the paper down on the waiter's podium thing and slides it towards him.
BRIANNE: Perhaps THIS will change your mind?
The waiter lifts up the paper to reveal that it has the words, "1 (ONE) FREE D-WORD PASS" written on it.
Brianne looks confident and smug awaiting his response.
WAITER: Ma'am, that isn't even one of the fun ones to say.
ALT Leslie is lighting up a cigarette on the stove. Behind her, Brianne is bending backwards from her hips up.
BRIANNE: Hey Leslie, check it out, I'm reverse bowing! This is how they flip people off in Japan.
NO I DO NOT WANT TO SEE THE REST OF THE MONA LISA I WANT TO SEE THE PRE RENDERED BACKGROUNDS FROM THE PS1 FINAL FANTASY GAMES UPSCALED TO 4K BECAUSE SQUARE LOST THE ORIGINAL FILES SO THEY CAN NEVER RERENDER THEM HOW DO I TURN CAPS OFF I AM NEW TO COMPUTERS
ALT Brianne attempts to show Leslie her cool trick to get all of the sodas into the fridge at once, but she fucks it up and all of the soda cans wind up on the floor.
ALT Leslie and Brianne are doing the Pokemon Concierge job and that lady tells them to find a Pokemon and make them happy, so they offer a child to a Drifloon.
In Reggie’s autobiography, he talks about his time at Panda Express, and how he was excited to push the chain to compete against small family-run Chinese food restaurants. He left the company after they decided to pull back on expanding.
ALT Brianne is reading her phone in bed next to a sleeping Leslie. A loud ad from Brianne's phone awakens the sleepy Leslie, and Brianne assures her that she is still sleeping, and should go back to sleep.
If Elon were capable of being clever or funny, he would've just gifted this account the blue checkmark, like he did with Stephen King. He had the perfect own teed up for him, and he just completely whiffed it.