(Kyoh-dee-nee) Makes nice things on YouTube & Patreon. Runs D&D for @oxventure. Likes Blood Bowl. Formerly @eurogamer. They/them
London
- Tweets 47,019
- Following 1,740
- Followers 26,011
- Likes 35,130
My wife took a bath and the pets - who all hate being washed - came into the bathroom to make sure she was OK
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I love my wife very much, but over the past few weeks she has been making a long furby for a friend's birthday and it has made living here very uncomfortable
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The vengabus is coming
And everybody's jumping
The vengabus' purpose
A rail replacement service
To take you to some stations
We thank you for your patience
Might want to set out early
It will delay your journey
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There's no real way to say this without sounding like I'm encouraging arson, but imagine if all the sprinklers went off in Lush
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Hello. I've been discovering some new things about myself recently and thanks to the support of some wonderful people, I'm feeling confident enough to be open about it.
My pronouns are they/them. Please adjust accordingly <3
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"Dyou remember that day mum took us hiking with a cafe menu board?"
"Yeah, what the fuck?"
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Bought some bulbasaur dungarees and they fit better than anything I've ever owned I will not be taking questions at this time
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It sux that I can't share pictures of my wife online because some people don't know how to behave, but it's our four year wedding anniversary today. I love her so much.
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It's nonbinary awareness week so I am dropping in to say hello my pronouns are they/them and enby people don't owe anybody androgeny ok byeeeee
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[CW: White supremacy]
Handy thing about painting miniatures for a hobby is you've always got some spray paint knocking about.
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I don't remember when I first discovered this image but I think about it A LOT.
It's like someone was asked to make this chart and was affronted at even having to include a jay in the first place
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Paramore's misery business contains the lyrics
'It's a matter of time before we all run out
When I thought he was mine, she caught him by the mouth'
and then there's nothing in the rest of the song to suggest Hayley Williams *isn't* singing about a fish
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This is fucking nonsense. Fund the NHS you morally bankrupt, reprehensible egotists
Tonight at 6pm we will clap to honour the life of Sir @CaptainTomMoore and all those health workers who he recognised with his fundraising.
#ClapForCaptainTom
ALT Image of Sir Captain Tom Moore. Text reads: Clap for Captain Tom. 6pm this evening.
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While nonbinary people don't owe anybody androgeny, I have a big old beard. People are going to use the wrong pronouns and I'm ready for that - but they'll adapt faster if they're told politely and positively.
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Four years to the day since Watson came barreling into our lives and changed everything for the better
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Some news! Next week will be my last as Head of Video for Dicebreaker. I'll always be proud of the work I've done to help found DB, but it's time for me to move on to the next chapter.
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My own personal feelings about the monarchy aside, my mum just got an MBE and, as one of the children she initially gave up nursing to raise, I am intensely proud
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In case anyone needs it right now, here's Watson exactly three years ago when she was small enough to weigh on the kitchen scales
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Hello all! Sorry to say I'm not streaming today - we reckon Lil Speedy is going to give birth any time now and I need to be on hand to help out
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Thank you everybody for being so lovely about the news - I am going for a nap now because GOODNESS ME it has been an emotional day so far
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Happy international women's day! Trans women are women and anybody who doesn't include them in their feminism is not a feminist xx
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I know this will be small change to a lot of outlets but eeeee my little channel hit 20 thousand subscribers on YouTube and I am quietly proud of myself piped.video/johnnychiodini
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Pissing myself at the Brexiteers telling other Brits that they should live somewhere else if they don't like the country any more.
You just made that infinitely harder, you daft xenophobic cunts
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Struggling to understand where your issue with us knowing how the cats feel about being bathed is coming from here, Chris. Not gonna lie.
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Thanks for the support, everyone, I'm going to work very hard at this
@johnneh Good morning, just wanted to wish you many congratulations on your election as president of Chile
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The kittens are nearly able to climb out of the pen - it's a matter of days until we are overrun
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A note in particular to those who watch my stuff and comment on videos or livestreams - it's going to take time for people to adjust. Please, please be gentle if you decide to correct anybody.
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Saw somebody say that, when DMing for the Oxventure, I am a railroady prick. Like, buddy they've replaced the nooses on a gallows with udon noodles, dressed the dragonborn up as a seahorse & repeatedly tried to launch a Beatles tribute act. I can't keep a hold on them AT ALL
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To all the lovely people informing me that there is a character in Life is Strange 2 that looks like me:
Believe me. I know.
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I treated myself to a denim jacket online and got all excited to walk around in my cute new Autumn threads. I forgot that 1) denim jackets often hit at the waist and that 2) I am long in the torso. It looks like a crop top.
Anyway my wife looks great in her new jacket
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Pro tip: if a kitten won't stop attacking your legs, simply hold it until you are done making coffee
ALT The photo shows the tweet author looking unimpressed. In one hand, close to their chest, they are holding a kitten. The kitten is a silver tabby. She looks cute and wholly unrepentant, despite her crimes
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I bought a cradle so I can play animal crossing in bed with my arms by my side and it is one of the best decisions I have ever made
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Posted something earlier that just snuck under the size limit to be sent as a large letter. I know this because the man in the Post Office measured it precisely then glared at me and said 'only just' like I had done a murder but he didn't have enough evidence to convict.
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Well, there we have it. After nearly two years with @joindicebreaker and four and a half with @eurogamer, I have left Gamer Network / ReedPop. Cannot emphasise enough how life-changing it's been. Going to miss a LOT of people.
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You might find benefit in spending 45 seconds watching a dog in a rainy wood beasting a massive stick
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My wife, who continues to be an inspiration, has made stickers to combat racist nonsense on the streets
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I want to go to a house party and end up in the kitchen chatting to someone over the course of precisely three cans of lukewarm beer and having enough fun to consider staying in touch but deciding to let it slide in favour of remembering them fondly and indistinctly for years
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Just a few hours until I'm safely installed in my new home enjoying that most noble of traditions - eating Chinese takeaway on the floor surrounded by boxes and feeling very disorientated
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I was planning to tweet 'my new year's resolution is to tell more people to fuck off' and then tell anybody who replied to fuck off but I haven't got the energy so please just imagine that was a bit I did. Thank you (fuck off)
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I have officially launched on Patreon! Visit patreon.com/johnnychiodini or watch this video for more details and find my channel - piped.video/EFHnJbcQcbw
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I have some fairly persistent body image issues because I've always carried a bit of extra weight but I shan't lie, the last week or so I've kind of been feeling myself.
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Off work sick because my mental health is piss poor at the minute. Watson has 100% worked it out because she won't leave me alone for a second
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My wife took a picture of me and the dog having a cuddle and it accidentally came out like a religious fresco
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New profile picture but please be honest, does it look like I'm listening to someone or if I'm posing to look into the middle distance (like a wanker)
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Work hat back on for a moment: I've been made aware that adverts for The Bigot Author's Wizard Game are running on some of the videos on my channel. Unfortunately I'm unable to block those ads specifically, so I wanted to say a few words.
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Hello, I have some news - after four and a half years at Eurogamer and eleven (!!) talking about video games for a living, I'm moving on to something new
Time for some Eurogamer news: this week we say goodbye to @johnneh and congratulations to @AoifeLockhart! eurogamer.net/articles/2019-…
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ALT The photo shows Johnny reclining on a bed, smiling at the camera. Resting on their chest and cupped in their hands is a little calico kitten whose name is Sigorney Weaver But A Cat
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Sorry to get serious re: mental health for a minute, but this kind of thing has started happening more frequently lately and it's not ok. Learn where the boundaries lie and respect them.
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Just think, there's someone out there who is destined to be the first person to throw up on an Elizabeth Line train after too many drinks and they don't even know it yet
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He's not my king. It's a disgrace that this much is being spent on a backward, redundant ritual when people can't afford to heat their homes or feed themselves. Fuck the lot of em.
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My wonderful, beautiful, talented friend Alice-who-isn't-on-twitter-but-sort-of-is crocheted me an enbee and it is one of the most wonderful surprises I have ever received
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I've been presenting since I was nineteen years old. Bodies change. Why people don't think these comments will be seen by the people they're discussing baffles me.
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Just watched Knives Out for the first time and holy shit that film is exactly as good as everyone said. Very glad I avoided spoilers or descriptions of any kind.
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I don't ordinarily go for end of year posts, but this year has been anything but ordinary. CW: depression, suicide.
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I just spent three days having pretty much constant suicidal ideation and an entire day as a human dial tone - I don't think I had a single original thought yesterday and I remember very little of it - but I'm coming out the other side and feeling pretty much normal now. Hooray.
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My brilliant, wonderful father retired from clinical work today after an astonishing 37 years at the Hospital for Tropical Diseases. I am so proud to be his son.
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Hello everyone, sorry to say I'm not streaming this afternoon - long story short, this time of year is always disastrous for my mental health. I'm taking some time this week to sort myself out, I'll be back on form soon. Watson says hi
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Just chased down a crew blasting Hitler speeches over mic on Sea of Thieves so I could get capture of it / their usernames and make a report. Not a quest I hope to repeat, but very satisfying all the same.
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Wholesome tweet: I have some body image issues because I was teased about my weight a lot as a kid but I got some dungers recently and frankly they make me feel cute af
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I am on a shirt! I am in a shirt! I... am a shirt?
Sometimes it can be hard to be yourself, but it can be great to be literally everyone else in the world!
From Bismuth to Binbag - and ESPECIALLY the guild’s DM @johnneh - celebrate EVERYONE with this ringer tee.
Grab your favourites now, exclusively at insertcoinclothing.com/outsi…
ALT Johnny wearing our LEEITW tee, with a guest appearance from Watson. Blep.
ALT Model wearing our LEEITW tee
ALT Model wearing our LEEITW tee
ALT Models wearing our LEEITW tees
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Ah yes, the momentary giddy high of another disgraced prime minister before the creeping dread of thinking about who's next
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One would not like to discount the possibility that you would enjoy 45 seconds of a dog being a nuisance on a rapidly inflating mattress
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The Oxventure gets a lovely writeup in this article, but this sentence in particular spun me out - delighted to have my name thrown in with some of the best in the business
Whether you've already tried #CriticalRole and need something new, or are simply curious about RPG series, you’re in luck!
Roll for initiative, read on, and prepare to be ensorcelled by these other D&D live stream shows and podcasts!
tor.com/2022/01/27/beyond-cr…
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My wife is growing king oyster mushrooms for us to eat. I'm watching them closely in case they grow little arms and punch my head off
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