Daily Telegraph arts and entertainment editor. TV critic. Bradfordian

I wasn’t planning to plug this podcast again but I’m reading Tim Burgess’s autobiography and he mentions Pretty in Pink AND Betamax so it feels like a message from on high
12
9
71
Lenny Henry just introduced himself at this media conference with: “Hello, I’m Justin Trudeau”
405
4,347
34,061
Woman in my train carriage smoothly telling the conductor that her son is travelling free because he’s only four, while the kid repeatedly yells: “BUT I’M NOT FOUR”
602
1,637
31,855
When I had a miscarriage, I remember scouring the internet for articles by women who had been through the same thing. Because reading that you're not alone is helpful and it's comforting. So thank you to Meghan Markle for writing about something so difficult
156
1,760
27,756
How has Dominic Raab made it into government and not found his level as an assistant manager of a leisure centre in Stevenage
766
2,041
17,533
One of my favourite celebrity genres is ‘Heartfelt Apology After Phone Call From Hysterical Agent’
W H I S T L E R ⭕️
1,489
1,829
16,512
I am absolutely living for Helen Mirren’s tour of Bradford
105
1,479
15,400
Lol come back when your kid is three and let me know how it’s going
693
662
13,819
She might convince you to get a proper job and move out of your gran’s house
Lesson: never marry a feminist.
55
2,005
12,747
The Finsbury Park elephants looking good today after having another trim
80
485
10,674
Saying Stormzy should be extra grateful to live in Britain because he’s black/working class/son of an immigrant is low even by her standards
180
4,781
10,689
This horse did not sign up for a photo opportunity with Marine Le Pen, and he wants you to know it
121
5,645
9,580
ITV boss Carolyn McCall just revealed that ITV called Domino's to complain that this tweet wasn't funny, which just makes it more funny #RTSconvention
79
873
9,756
I just read the full Prince Andrew transcript. If ever you worry that you’re not doing well enough at work, just remember there is a PR professional out there who thought it was a good idea to let Britain’s dumbest royal be dismantled by Emily Maitlis
154
1,087
9,310
Thinking about this horse today
This horse did not sign up for a photo opportunity with Marine Le Pen, and he wants you to know it
23
537
9,503
315,934
Michael Heseltine speaking at the Hay Festival: “Racism is basically what underpins UKIP and Reform. I’m just over 90, I have lived through some of the most tumultuous events of our time, and anyone who is looking for the common theme: it’s racism.”
171
1,789
7,455
891,216
Look at this completely gorgeous woman on the new cover of Vogue. Anisa Omar, who works in King’s Cross Waitrose. Because of social distancing she didn’t get a make-up artist so this is all her own work. I’m swooning
68
755
8,226
Absolutely fascinates me that Liz Truss has made “I grew up in Leeds and it was shit” the cornerstone of her political message
267
583
7,845
Billie Piper trolling Laurence Fox like nobody’s business
59
729
7,504
Emma Thompson gives such good photo #Coronation
68
377
7,609
481,677
OF COURSE Dominic Cummings, who has spent the past year accusing the BBC of being too Islington, lives in a giant townhouse in Islington
46
694
6,771
There is no bookshop more beautiful than Bradford @Waterstones
152
301
7,074
All the people fancying Rishi Sunak are gonna be psyched when they discover there are actually thousands of British Indian men out there who wear nicely pressed hoodies and fulfilled their parents’ dull but financially prudent career aspirations
72
329
6,856
The same Downing Street that issued a statement on Jo Brand the other day. Good to have priorities in order
29
1,272
5,462
I don't want my kids addicted to Fortnite but equally I don't want to be lectured by a prince with no experience of children, and whose future children will be able to knock about the palace gardens instead of sitting inside playing videogames
‘Fortnite should be banned’, says Prince Harry bit.ly/2UlOJzi
223
747
5,539
Every newsroom: - Can you do a weather story - Do I have to, they’re so boring - Just do it - FINE
45
1,590
5,310
Nicholas Witchell currently speculating that the Queen has had cancer, that she had a fall last year, that she has gout, that she recently had a cannula in her hand - feels grossly intrusive to discuss someone's health like this
453
207
5,171
Just a reminder that Britain is full of headteachers of outstanding schools in multicultural areas who just quietly get on with the job and don’t make stupid pronouncements on here for attention
83
455
4,850
140,145
If you're wondering why David Cameron's bottom shelf isn't quite full, it's because he hid the Hitler book before the photographer came round
179
875
4,975
Is the Times food section feeling ok
227
301
4,957
Why does this woman keep going on about temp jobs she did at college? She’s 42
EXCLUSIVE: Kemi Badenoch shares her experience working as the only woman on a building site with 300 men earlier in her career. @tnewtondunn | @KemiBadenoch
241
358
4,418
I’m no fan of David Cameron but to describe him as only experiencing “privileged pain” when he had a profoundly disabled child who died aged six is a terrible thing to say theguardian.com/commentisfre…
360
731
4,789
The Mail: ugh, foreign nurses Also The Mail: why can't these lovely white foreign nurses come to work here immediately
92
3,371
4,209
Nadine Dorries on C4 exuding the energy of a woman who's going to get thrown out of the pub for glassing someone in about two hours' time
28
266
4,263
189,461
Just a reminder that Emily Maitlis was paid less than her male colleagues and didn’t even make the list of high earners until it was made public and the BBC was embarrassed into adjusting her pay
27
517
4,028
Start your weekend with Denise Welch
Denise Welch: ‘Who would I like to say sorry to? The people I hurt when I was addicted to alcohol and cocaine’ dlvr.it/SzbtZW
33
232
4,456
1,597,842
So Matt Lucas and David Walliams have cut the blackface from Little Britain to “reflect the changes in the cultural landscape” (and get it back on iPlayer) yet this has stayed in 🙄
206
452
4,097
God, I love the Telegraph
64
1,217
3,832
I like the way @PippaCrerar is stripping this story across the weekend rather than dropping it all as a boxset
60
263
3,702
This is Finsbury Park resident Alison, who has lived here for more than 30 years ❤️
27
1,109
3,716
Every journalist at the daily briefing should agree to ask questions about Cummings and nothing else
76
331
3,468
Peak Telegraph
155
1,596
3,381
Kazuo Ishiguro on what it's like to be a British writer with a Japanese name
21
1,224
3,392
The only political commentary I need today
16
307
3,393
Jonathan Gullis, Tory MP for Stoke-on-Trent North, just billed himself as “someone who grew up on Dad’s Army and Porridge and loves those traditional programmes of the past” (he is calling for the abolition of the licence fee on anti-wokery grounds) He is 31
215
385
3,110
There’s something almost poignant about Dominic Cummings composing a 42-tweet thread while everyone ignores him and watches Eurovision
52
197
3,166
Whatever Harry and Meghan are paying for PR advice, they need a full refund
187
226
3,289
Pizza Express remains the best restaurant for young kids. Dough balls. Mini pizza. Ice cream. Colouring and stickers. Anyone who would rather take a 3-yr-old to a hipster pizza joint with artisan mozzarella is being a dick
157
213
3,012
Tickled by Katie Hopkins’ discovery that there are Lebanese restaurants on the Edgware Road
163
392
2,711
Have a Twix, love
364
2,654
2,725
Oh my god I love him
'She really is beautiful, innit.' This is the moment a cheeky student complimented the Duchess of Sussex, receiving roars of laughter from both his classmates and Meghan. The duchess was visiting the school ahead of #InternationalWomensDay. More: itv.com/news/2020-03-07/megh…
49
214
2,636
Absolutely hooting that Holy and Phil trashed their own reputations for a report so bad it included Holly saying the queue was "this ever-moving line which is in real contrast to the stillness of her" #ThisMorning
72
179
2,669
Andrea Leadsom is that woman from the Rotary Club who tells Linda she isn't welcome at the cheese and wine evening now she's a divorcee
69
1,554
2,392
I worry that the Cummings story means this picture won’t get the attention it deserves
164
257
2,440
Finsbury Park elephant hedge looking rather splendid this morning
49
766
2,131
Oh shut up
210
134
2,335
360,401
There'll be lots of talk about George Michael's "demons" and "troubled life" today. So here's a reminder that he was hilarious. On Band Aid:
19
928
2,087
I see wearing trousers is woke now. Does this only apply to fictional mice or is it a wider rule, I’m not sure who to ask
94
191
1,940
As the parent of a 2-yr-old and a 4-yr-old I very much appreciate this column from Matthew Parris
106
750
2,121
This might be the greatest intro I’ve ever read
45
460
2,112
Ceramics and glass a foot off the floor, you might want to move those in three months’ time, just some free advice
71
15
1,994
This is extremely funny. “Would you like to come on my podcast to talk about why, unlike me, you’re a sociopath?”
73
167
2,312
183,525
Glad that’s sorted. I hear there’s no sexism in the UK either
65
234
1,866
I'm genuinely fascinated by how famous and rich and successful and ubiquitous James Corden has become despite nobody seeming to like him
67
281
1,883
If this was a disaster movie, we'd all be watching the news reports on a wall-mounted TV in a small but busy bar
54
185
1,861
oh my god story of the year
'Seagull Boy', nine, wins European screeching competition bbc.in/4d6T2Dd
3
125
2,025
105,880
Take the politics of lockdown out of it and what you have is a man horrified by the idea of having to look after his own child while his wife is ill, because that is a job for women and not a Maverick Genius™️
17
223
1,780
Oh god this is joyous
37
359
1,651
So people are angry that The Crown shows Prince Charles having a long-running affair with Camilla? The same Prince Charles who *checks notes* had a long-running affair with Camilla?
38
214
1,777
“Foreigners. Anyone who looks different to me. Immigrants. It was Mosley and his blackshirts in the 1930s… in the 1960s it was Enoch Powell… You only have to listen to Reform or UKIP or Nigel Farage to know what they’re saying”
25
222
1,547
98,605
All the people having a go at Meghan for visiting the Texas school memorial were just as angry about Kate going to the Sarah Everard vigil, right? Just checking
321
185
1,640
I tell you who this will hurt the most - the parents of Extinction Rebellion protesters, currently sitting at the breakfast tables of their Georgian rectories in Ottery St Mary without their morning newspaper
87
200
1,774
Your child can’t get her own toys out because she’s a BABY, as soon as she can reach that Duplo you’re screwed, my friends
25
10
1,613
NOBODY MENTION THAT TIME CHERYL PUNCHED A TOILET ATTENDANT WHO ASKED HER TO PAY FOR A LOLLIPOP
Cheryl Tweedy bids to airbrush her criminal past by calling in lawyers to ban reports of her conviction dailym.ai/2DCxlMu
30
464
1,521
Duke of Cambridge gives a speech saying it “simply cannot be right” that people of different ethnicities have been shut out of the royal family, oh no sorry he said the film industry #BAFTAs
70
275
1,475
The thing that annoys me about the Roald Dahl changes is how stupid they are. A ban on the word “fat” yet keeping in the rest of the description in which Augustus Gloop is clearly fat
93
181
1,522
418,161
Brad Pitt isn't at the #Baftas but sent a message: "Hey Britain, heard you just became single - welcome to the club"
14
189
1,491
MailOnline commenters overflowing with the milk of human kindness
60
930
1,423
List of people who could have been in the #FriendsReunion instead of James Corden's friend David Beckham: Paul Rudd, Julia Roberts, Danny DeVito, Bruce Willis, George Clooney, Giovanni Ribisi, Christina Applegate, Winona Ryder, Hank Azaria, FERGIE
66
98
1,489
Michelle and Barack Obama review Les Miserables
79
196
1,361
This reading book for 5-yr-olds is the shadiest thing you'll see today
31
413
1,294
Never seen this portrait of the Queen before and I love it. Like she’d quite happily take you out the back and give you a kicking if you didn’t behave yourself (pic by John Swannell)
34
97
1,432
Much love for the @Se_Railway ticket man who has special dinosaur and unicorn hole punches for children’s tickets 😍
27
123
1,352
I am a Durham miner’s granddaughter, going to start working it into the headlines of all my stories because it’s extremely relevant
100
86
1,195
It’s too late for this year’s Booker shortlist but Pat Sharp has written a book in which he inserts himself into history, Forrest Gump-style
82
286
1,241
Seeing Blue Peter presenter Michael Sundin in the BBC4 Elton John doc has made me remember the absolute awfulness of this
39
129
1,235
And here we are
165
361
1,318
1,133,767
Dani and Jack: 3 series on ITVBe Kaz and Josh: parents to world's cutest baby Megan and Wes: dumps him for a footballer Laura and Paul: split up at the airport
8
194
1,317
“Middleton family blood” what even is this
216
118
1,169
Could it just possibly be... that Meghan and Harry considered their private exchange of vows to be the day they got married, while acknowledging that the wedding was the public/legal bit? Which isn’t *that* weird?
85
97
1,188
Furious that when I sat down to watch this drama about a notorious serial killer it included details of his notorious serial killing
43
141
1,193
And these two other fabulous covers featuring London Overground driver Narguis Horsford and community midwife Rachel Millar. Who needs supermodels and terrible celebrities?google.co.uk/amp/s/www.vogue…
14
149
1,149
The more I think about this, the more absurd it gets. A grown woman wants to have a say in the birth of her child and gets criticised for it
43
122
1,117
I’d say 90% of my home life now is spent killing moths
23
108
1,154
Impressed they’re managing to hold the Islington North count in the Sobell Centre, where nobody has answered the phone in the past 5 years of me trying to book soft play birthday parties
17
56
1,117
Always read beyond the headline, Allison
7
18
969
Gary Lineker is "stepping back from Match of the Day", says the BBC
168
130
1,109
5,440,421
BBC chairman Richard Sharp confirms Jess Brammar has been appointed #RTSCambridge
40
144
954
I’ve written about Nadine Dorries once in my life and to be honest I think it covers everything
23
127
909
I mean I grew up knowing someone who qualified as a lawyer AND a doctor, Sunak can only dream of attaining that brag-to-the-aunties level
15
24
963
Michelle Obama to an audience of girls: “Start practising for the sisterhood. We as women don’t have the luxury of tearing each other down. There are enough people out there ready to tear us down. There’s no room for mean girls”
8
267
926