@tonyising.bsky.social
Melbourne, Victoria, Australia
- Tweets 15,709
- Following 527
- Followers 1,140
- Likes 9,790
Pinned Tweet
On this Australia Day Eve, I celebrate all the things that make this country great - for there are many - and reflect on all the things we could improve as a nation, not least of all our relationship with the traditional owners of the land we now occupy. ✊🏿
1
2
30
That's the way we do it in Australia. I arranged for my girlfriend to get bitten by a Redback Spider, and had a big "Will You Marry Me?" banner hanging in the Intensive Care Ward when she arrived at the hospital for the anti-venom.
43
299
4,680
She said no that time. So I tried again. Took her swimming in the monstrous Aussie surf. She got caught in a savage riptide. After I rescued her, I had to perform CPR on the beach. Breathe... "Will"... Breathe... "You"... Breathe... "Marry"... Breathe..."Me?". Again she said no.
4
29
748
Finally, in the grip of a global pandemic, I again asked her to marry me while the world was dying - as if I was the last man in the world. She finally said yes, and we lived a long and happy life, BECAUSE WE WORE A FUCKING MASK.
20
27
736
For the update to load, please ensure your phone is fully charged, turned off, the kids are all asleep, you've left out milk and cookies and all your doors and windows are locked. Ensure you've rebooted your internet connection. Also provide 100 points of identification.
5
23
603
25,147
So again I tried. Took her bushwalking in the unforgiving Australian desert. After three days of wandering in the scorching heat, we ran out of water. As she lay there dying of thirst, she reached into the empty water-bottle and pulled out a note which read "Will you marry me?"
8
31
565
Today's fun fact: 55,436 for the 2007 A-League Grand Final between Melbourne Victory and Adelaide United remains the largest ever crowd for any sporting event at Docklands Stadium.
19
11
238
29,612
Will not for a second ever defend bottle throwing and condemn it in the strongest possible way. But what goes through your mind when you score to seal an epic come-from-behind Grand Final in front of your adoring home fans and you decide to do this?
37
7
211
37,151
BREAKING: The APL Board has reversed its decision to host the A-Leagues Grand Finals in Sydney, instead signing a multi-million dollar deal with Melton City Council to secure the showpiece events at City Vista Recreation Reserve for the next three years.
12
5
179
I’ve always argued car manufacturers should produce clasdic car exteriors with modern vehicle luxury and technology. I am totally buying one of these.
5
2
171
The documents themselves were plastered all over the windows to stop the moonlight shining in.
4
4
143
1,438
Whenever I hear pundits try their had I’m always reminded of my favorite sports press conference of all time. piped.video/eAjd_jTvURc
8
16
175
Whatever the result tonight, anybody saying the A-League has no passion is dead-set delusional. #MCYvWEL
5
2
126
You could spend all day on this clip, analysing the actions of each player. My favourite is the bowler. Just an absolute spectator after the delivery. No attempt to get back to the stumps. And then the throw. He was worse than the shot or the dropped catch. I can't stop watching.
10
2
102
YOU CAN’T TELL ME PEOPLE DON’T DRIVE TO THE MCG WHILE THERE ARE HOMOSEXUALS ALL OVER AFRICA!
3
2
109
1,966
My other takeaway from today's announcement is that it kicks in 2023. That's THIS SEASON. So the Grand Final arrangements have been altered for a season that is already underway. Some next level WOW about that.
5
14
101
Luka Modric’s dreams of earning an @ALeague marquee spot have been dashed after @FFA issued the Croatian a five year ban for igniting a flare in public.
Luka Modric has arrived in Zagreb to a hero's welcome. He was amazing throughout the World Cup, fully deserved. nitter.app/FutbolBible/status/101…
7
18
103
Greatest moments in AFL history: Diego Maradona scores a rushed behind vs England in the 1986 Finals Series.
4
3
98
We gotta get over this bullshit notion that we can’t have any A-League during AFL season.
It's football season.
We kick off our 2022/23 campaign in two weeks!
Join the movement > mvf.club/join
7
3
96
There’s something about a #Socceroos crowd that no other code has got. They all want it. They all claim to have it. But this is Australia’s true national team.
8
97
I love @FOXSportsAUS and all they’ve done for Australian football but this is just my annual text to express how much I detest half time interviews with players. I don’t know any fan who wants it. #SYDvMVC
11
7
86
Imagine for the next three years, SydneyFC and/or WSW actually get good at football and win the right to host the GF. $15million dollars from Destination NSW when they could have had it for free!
2
1
85
It’s official. FIFA WWC live site at my place then. All welcome. Gonna get this guy to organise it.
3
77
4,058
To be fair, @MelbourneCity crowd tonight was always going to be poor given the weather conditions. #MCYvADL
4
35
76
Totally joking. The true Aussie way is to turn to your sheila when the pregnancy test is positive and suggest “S’pose we should get hitched, aye?”
6
2
66
FAKING NEWS: AFL announces it is bidding for the Women's Football World Cup - as soon as they can find another country to play it.
5
24
65
Hope he copped a $1600 fine for being out without a valid reason. "Having a sook" doesn't qualify.
1
1
66
BREAKING: @FFA have ordered a sensational replay of the 2006/07 @ALeague Grand Final after retrospective VAR analysis proves Archie Thompson’s fourth goal was offside.
5
11
67
CFG players do have a history of throwing flares back into crowds.
A dark night for Troyes. Their home match vs Valenciennes is abandoned as fans throw flares onto pitch, and some players throw them back into stands! Troyes are on the brink of successive relegations. Owned by the City Football Group, fans ironically chant "Merci City".
1
4
70
4,121
Melbourne on an Easter Sunday afternoon. Train packed with Swans Fans, Tigers fans, Melbourne United fans, Victory fans. All buzzing. All chatting amongst each other. Bloody brilliant.
5
2
59
3,422
Also, I’m not making any political commentary on the fact that this crowd figure was made possible by hosting an A-League GF in a venue earned by the home team.
1
54
1,661
Dude is my fkin hero. Give him the jeys to the city. Make him Australian of the Year. LEGEND!!
2
49
2,544
Cristiano Ronaldo has been named on the bench for Portugal. Rumours swirling that he is on the lookout for a new national team to represent ahead of #Euro2024 #FIFAWorldCup2022
3
4
61
Anyone doubting the ability of Brenton Speed need only watch this clip. BEST LEAGUE IN THE WORLD.
3
1
59
I love your updates, however you mess with my OCD by presenting vax stats in % ranking except for the kiddies which is alphabetical. No biggie.
4
55
Manchester City Champions League Finals:
Before signing Danny Allsopp: 0
After signing Danny Allsopp: 1
3
1
59
Never been a fan of booing national anthems. Except for tonight. Tonight was a night when the fans really were the twelfth man. The Uruguayans visibly shaken with the ferocity of the reception. #AUSvURU (Yes I will continue to call it “tonight”!)
6
1
55
Melbourne Victory's FFA Cup match against Perth Glory has been rescheduled to allow us to steal more players off them.
Our @FFACup Play-off match against Perth Glory will be rescheduled for a later date #MVFC
1
6
60
Look, here’s a radical approach: how about embracing the support of the home crowd in the first leg and playing proactive football? 🤷🏻♂️
6
1
56
5,457
Evangicals: “Dear Lord, give us a sign!”
God: Blows down Trump’s wall.
Evangelicals: “It’s a sign we need to support our President more!”
2
2
48
Tarneit: Like Europe
Melbourne: Like Melbourne
Seated in a room overlooking the Tarneit pitch, John Aloisi points to where @wufcofficial’s future 15k stadium will be.
There's no hiding his excitement.
"The first time you feel like this is getting like Europe"
Our chat at Regional Football Facility.
aleagues.com.au/news/a-leagu…
5
56
5,394
For all the people moaning about @FFA, consider this. Yesterday, Australia's sport's darlings for decades @Hockeyroos made a World Cup semi-final with barely a media whimper. Today, news outlets are awash with stories about @TheMatildas. Our game has never been stronger.
8
1
54
Olyroos isn't "senior international football" though? This decision is mystifying for all Australian football fans.
1
55
1,055
Happy 16 November to all who celebrate. See you at AAMI Park tonight for the party. @Socceroos
4
52
1,960
#socceroos #ausvie What was I saying? Every other code wishes they had this. But they don’t. SPONSORS ARE YOU LISTENING?
1
1
49
Never thought I’d own a shit black Big Virg hoodie, but when I saw this in the op shop for $5 I just had to buy it to remind me of the time some guy lost his shit because everyone paid him out for his shit merch. #SokkahTwitter
2
2
53
You’re celebrating lifting the plate in front of less fans than I’m complaining about? You really owned me, there.
2
46
1,781
Brilliant idea to have Remembrance Round at a @MelbourneCity home game so we can have 90 minutes silence. #MCYvNEW #poppyappeal
17
48
So Arnie thinks the players playing in the Usbek local league are playing at a higher level than our players in leagues across Europe? Is that what he's saying here?
5
49
5,181
You really have to feel for all those “supporters” who ditched Victory to join Melbourne Heart because they didn’t like Ernie. Wonder how they’re feeling this morning? #NEWvMCY
6
5
49
I mean, it’s just not human error. Unless you count the fact that the human error is scheduling ads during play. Plenty of examples from the biggest sport on the planet how to provide sponsors with commercial benefit without resorting to this lazy as fuck media strategy.
3
3
49
Aziz Behich trying to dick the ball into the goal during the 2010 Grand Final. There’s no Vuk moment I relive in my head over and over more than this. And imagine how different A-League history would look if he’d just fkin kicked it.
7
1
52
If they knew how to use google they probably wouldn't be in this position in the first place!
1
42
916
We now cross to some dipshit for sideline comments: “The Victory supporters well and truely outnumbered here…”
7
3
45
4,847
“I’m proud to represent a country founded on democratic principles, where our right to protest against discrimination and injustice is enshrined in our constitution, without fear of persecution or incarceration (or worse) from our government. Now, do you have any more questions?”
1
2
50
I once did a presentation on Melbourne Victory to City of Melbourne on the same day as the Observation Wheel guys. Kinda proud how - despite all the knockers - Victory has outlasted this. @gomvfc
#BREAKING: The Melbourne Star giant observational wheel will close permanently after almost 13 years of operation.
Directors said ongoing #COVID19 restrictions and high-rise development in the area meant it was "impossible to sustain the business".
#9News | Nightly at 6pm
3
48
A couple of errors in that article. They have identified the incorrect team (Victory was handed a fine, not City). And they have reported that Tom Glover accidentally threw a flare back into the crowd. There was nothing accidental about it.
5
1
49
2,355
The best thing about watching women's sport live is the people who hate women's sport aren't there.
1
3
46
2,218
BREAKING: Having avoided defeat against Sydney FC, the Melbourne Victory board has offered Grant Brebner a long-term contract extension. #aleague #SYDvMVC
BREAKING: @Wleague and @ALeague games at Jubilee Stadium have been CALLED OFF due to the weather.
@FOXSportsNews #ALeague
2
6
42
Football Australia today announced its sanctions against Melbourne Victory, revealing that - as punishment - fans would be forced to watch the team for the rest of the season.
9
42
5,091
What fresh hell is this?
🚨#Cupset🚨
A massive result for Para Hills East as they defeat WT Birkalla in a 5 goal thriller!
#MagicOfTheCup
5
2
46
8,268
And for context I don’t usually mind the theatre of a goal celebration in front of opposing fans. This just seemed weird when 15,000 of your own fans are in the stadium too.
3
44
3,857
I love how all the pro/rel truthers never mention this kind of thing when they bleat that there’s no repercussions for finishing last in a “closed plastic franchise” system.
🚨 Perth Glory have announced 11 departures
Darryl Lachman
Mark Beevers
Aleks Susnjar
Bruce Kamau
Antonis Martis
Jayden Gorman
Josh Rawlins
Jaylan Pearman
Stefan Colakovski (overseas)
John Koutroumbis (overseas)
Salim Khelifi (mutual consent)
perthglory.com.au/news/alm-p…
6
42
15,083