Iowa State University Police Department@ISUPD

This account is not monitored 24/7. Dial 515-294-4428 for non-emergencies or 911 for emergencies. RTs are not an endorsement, but a chance to engage. IG: @ISUPD

 55 Armory Building
police.iastate.edu
Joined June 2013
You’re under arrest
Chris Jorgensen@TheChrisJorg
10 Nov 2017
You ain’t from Iowa if you never had one of these 😤
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You've heard of speed traps? We have weed traps
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Whether it's drunk driving or drunk texting your ex, don't be stupid this NYE
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Please stop vaping on campus. It's getting hard to see the buildings.
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It's nice to see so many students walking around with backpacks getting a head start on their "schoolwork"!
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We’ve talked about this. We get it...you vape 🙄
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We hope everyone has a great first day! Even the students who say they’re from Chicago but are really from the suburbs.
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You vs. the guy she tells you not to worry about
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you're under arrest
KCCI News@KCCINews
18 Oct 2019
Would you try this candy corn pizza? kcci.com/article/candy-corn-…
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Name a better trio. We’ll wait. nitter.app/barstoolisu/status/948…
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Instead of smoking weed today, eat a donut. Even better...have two! #GlazeItDontBlazeIt #420
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when we see the freshman we took a selfie with at DIS double fisting on 801 Day
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Final game day stats: - 90 citations - 32 arrests - 7 arrests above .20 BAC - 146 first aid calls
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mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmoist
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Hello. We have a few questions for your lizard if you don't mind.
izzy@danisnobunk
5 Mar 2018
I think my lizard may have murdered someone
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#TriviaTuesday: there are indeed laws when you're drinkin' Claws. This ain't Iowa City.
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Basically every ISU student: "WE WANT VEISHEA" Us: "NOOOOO!!!!!!"
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🎶 Country roads, take them home 🎶
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We're guessing that's not the birdie he wanted on that hole
KCCI News@KCCINews
24 Apr 2018
Incredible photos show high school golfer taken down by angry goose dlvr.it/QQcQgp
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┏┓ ┃┃╱╲ In ┃╱╱╲╲ this ╱╱╭╮╲╲house ▔▏┗┛▕▔ we ╱▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔╲ say bags not cornhole ╱╱┏┳┓╭╮┏┳┓ ╲╲ ▔▏┗┻┛┃┃┗┻┛▕▔
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Fun Fact Friday: We serve all Iowa State students...even ones who say they they're from Chicago but are really from the suburbs.
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Arresting Mother Nature isn't exactly a breeze.
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Final game day stats: - 52 citations - 31 arrests - 10 arrests above .20 BAC - 148 first aid calls
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A wonderful tribute to Celia
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Can we keep the weed to a bare minimum today? kthxbye. #GlazeItDontBlazeIt
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You're not a firework. Don't drive lit.
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Only two more sleeps until Winter Break! ...unless you're on meth...then you don't need sleep. Don't do meth. #DontMethWithIowa
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Freshmen: "We’re totally gonna be fine carrying this six pack in our backpack the weekend before class starts." Us:
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The vape gods are at it again. We are trying our best to mitigate the effects. Please use caution when driving around today.
box fan in foreground, foggy campanile in background

ALT box fan in foreground, foggy campanile in background

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Listening to WVU's fight song to prep for the weekend
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What in blood alcohol concentration?!
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Now that students are gone, we don’t feel so good...
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Not to be dramatic but it's the fourth week of school and people are still treating sidewalks like they're on the Tour de France.
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at least there's not a national cocaine day. #420day
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things that DON’T make you ugly - acne - being over/under weight - scars - stretch marks - body hair - thinning hair/loss - psoriasis/eczema/rashes - fat rolls - amputations - physical abnormalities things that DO make you ugly - stepping on the zodiac
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we forgot it was actually winter. based on the driving skills we've seen today, so did you.
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For when you're 0.3 seconds late for class
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PLEASE check your candy VERY CAREFULLY this halloween. We found CyRide 7132 in this bag of caramel m&m’s.
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tickets in 2017 will now have stories
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Dangerously cold temperatures are being reported. Please avoid going outside this afternoon and evening unless you have a lightsaber and tauntaun on hand
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*Pulls car over for traffic stop* My brain: DON’T SAY IT DON’T SAY IT DON’T SAY IT DON’T SAY IT DON’T SAY IT DON’T SAY IT DON’T SAY IT DON’T SAY IT DON’T SAY IT DON’T SAY IT DON’T SAY IT Me: “Bad boys bad boys, whatcha gonna do”
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If you’re going to set up a children’s basketball hoop for 801 Day, prepare to get schooled before classes even start
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Excuse me. We just wanted to let you know we've updated our privacy policy
Police officer knocking on a door

ALT Police officer knocking on a door

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Don’t want to take finals? You don’t have to. Show this tweet to your professor and say you have our permission.
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Halloween Safety Announcement: please throw all candy corn in the trash where it belongs
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Please dress appropriately today; temps range from the upper-teens to the mid-three hundreds.
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REMINDER: Halloween is over. Snow isn’t that scary. Please drive carefully, but not 4 mph.
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It's #NationalMargaritaDay but we're over here about to get Iced!
Photo of the ISU Campanile

ALT Photo of the ISU Campanile

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Iowa State University Pumpkin Department
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This behavior doesn't fly here
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#poltwt
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Please do not eat laundry detergent pods. Thanks.
WHO 13 News
@WHO13news
13 Jan 2018
Doctors Warn Teens Not to Eat Laundry Detergent Pods for New Internet Challenge bit.ly/2D1iNn6
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Without students here, we feel like Kevin when he gets left home alone. Hopefully we make it through the night with just our marbles, tar, feathers, and old gangster movies.
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So...you parked illegally and got caught? Then you admitted your crime to the police? 🤭😂
This Post is from an account that no longer exists.
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Iowa Space University Police Department
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You decide
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We’re feeling very unlucky all of a sudden
Iowa State Daily
@iowastatedaily
13 Apr 2018
Weekend plans rained out? BEER FOR LESS THAN 50 CENTS PER CAN — NOW THAT'S A PLAN!
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FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
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Candy Corn: 0% Candy 0% Corn 100% Disappointment #NationalCandyCornDay
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We are: ⚪️ a parking division ⚪️ a comedy club 🔘 a police department Looking for: ⚪️ donuts ⚪️ a long-term relationship 🔘 a shovel
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All you need is a light jacket. #april25
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Snow bae: evil twin of #saltbae
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What’s 4/20?
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100,000 retweets and we’ll wear this for finals week
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If you play “Bad Boys (Theme from COPS)” by Inner Circle at exactly 11:59:33 on New Year’s eve, you’ll hear “bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?” at midnight exactly. Start the new year off right.
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┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| _ ┻┳| •.•) using your hazard lights ┳┻|⊂ﾉ doesn't mean you can ┻┳| park anywhere
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Welcome back ⊂_ヽ 　 ＼＼ to campus 　　 ＼( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 　　　 >　⌒ヽ 　　　/ 　 へ＼ 　　 /　　/　＼＼we missed you 　　 ﾚ　ノ　　 ヽ_つ 　　/　/ 　 /　/| 　(　(ヽ 　|　|、＼ 　| 丿 ＼ ⌒) 　| |　　) / ノ )　　Lﾉ (_／
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Fun Fact Friday: in honor of hitting 40k followers, we will be personally thanking each and every one of you
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Just organizing some case files today
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There’s no limit to how many people we will arrest for these food crimes. Don’t push it, Minnesota. #ProtectAndServe
ℂ𝕙𝕣𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕪 𝕋𝕒𝕪𝕝𝕠𝕣@cjt12371
16 Nov 2017
You ain’t from Oklahoma if you don’t dip your Pop Tart in Ranch Dressing 🤷🏼‍♀️
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SCAM ALERT: Do not pay more than $2.50 for this. It’s not weed
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Happy last week of winter break! JK... get to class
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just because you’re drinking a pumpkin craft beer does NOT mean we think you’re “automatically” 21
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We don’t need some punk groundhog telling us it’s going to be freezing in the middle of Iowa during the month of February
ABC News
@ABC
2 Feb 2018
Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow, meaning 6 more weeks of winter #GroundhogDay abcn.ws/20DVkOJ

Video

See the whole picture with @ABC News.

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this season we will refer to the white stuff on the ground as s***. let the innuendos begin! (Also, please slow down. Roads and sidewalks are slippery because of this s***.)
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Could be your tweets...
Wyoming (MN) Police
@wyomingpd
10 Jul 2017
The strong manure smell in town is back. We checked the area for Packer fans and didn't find any, so we must assume it's the farm fields.
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When you haven’t contributed anything to the group project all semester, the group is mad at you, and you still argue for an A
Trooper Ben
@TrooperBenKs
28 Nov 2017
I let my haters be my motivators..
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Fun Fact Friday: apparently there’s a sports ball contest tomorrow
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The Curtiss-Beardshear Run has been canceled for tonight. Sorry for any inconvenience this may cause
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It’s too cold...even for the Minnesotans
IowaStateUNews@IowaStateUNews
28 Jan 2019
#IowaState classes will be canceled, offices closed from 5 p.m. Tuesday, Jan. 29, until noon on Thursday, Jan. 31, due to predicted record wind chill. news.iastate.edu/news/2019/0…
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You asked; we answered. GAME DAY ♥️💛♥️💛
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On second thought, because the weather outside is beyond frightful, just celebrate from the comfort of your couch
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Final game day stats - Special #LibertyBowl Edition:
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Stop talking trash about Ames pizza Jeff’s is CLASSIC Dominos is SPEEDY Blaze is REVOLUTIONARY Papa John's Pizza Ranch is the OG
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Welcome back?
Uno card reading "go back to classes or draw 25", person holding a bunch of Uno cards

ALT Uno card reading "go back to classes or draw 25", person holding a bunch of Uno cards
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It snows like three inches and some people are treating it like snowpocalypse 🙄
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Nobody invited us to 801 so we're inviting ourselves. Have fun AND be intelligent; they're not mutually exclusive!
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ISU Alert: Don’t jeopardize the fall semester! Be responsible - wear a face covering, stay 6 feet apart, avoid large gatherings.
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Considering replacing all of our squad cars with longboards. Funding secured.
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The legacy of Celia will continue to live on at Iowa State. Forever in our hearts. Forever a Cyclone. Never forgotten. #CBA
CBA golf ball marker atop a rock overlooking folks walking on central campus

ALT CBA golf ball marker atop a rock overlooking folks walking on central campus

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Before: Today at 7:40AM After: Today at 11:10AM
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Hey students! We’re here to help you understand some important Iowa State terminology. GPA: gotta pass algebra UBILL: ur broke it’s literally logical UDCC: usually distributes cookies & cakes MWL: mid western laugh ISUPD: Iowa State University’s Greatest Dept.
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┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| ┻┳| ┳┻| _ ┻┳| •.•) The groundhog ┳┻|⊂ﾉ was really wrong. ┻┳|
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🤔🤔🤔
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Good morning. Let the stress begin!
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Meet our new four-legged employee, Zosia! She's a certified therapy dog working with our Mental Health Advocate, Kinsey Phillips. You can meet her all week at Barks@Parks! #woof
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we prepared all season for this
Fake website stating grass lots are closed for the football bowl game

ALT Fake website stating grass lots are closed for the football bowl game

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we are officially changing our name to THE Iowa State University Police Department
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just because it's rush week doesn't mean you can park wherever you want. that includes you, dad
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